Is teaching really for me?

I posted the other day about my conversation with Mike and my questioning whether or not I want to be a teacher. I do that often- daily, weekly, monthly, you get the idea. It depends- when I have a defeat at work I question.

I have a bachelors and minor degree that could be very marketable- Spanish and my major could allow me to work in any sort of job I want- journalism, public relations, marketing, human resources, and anything writing related. I would love to do something in one of those fields. Is it difficult to break in? Is it something I am scared of? Does it take time? Does it take sacrifice? Yes to all of those.

I have talked to friends who tell me I have everything it takes to succeed in banking, management, or sales. I think all of those would be neat. Do you have to work your way up in many of those fields to get a level of success for a modest income that you can live comfortably? Yes.

Why am I not taking the sacrifices and trying something different? My comfort level. I tend to stick within my comfort level and teaching just seemed natural.

I have applied for jobs in the fields I mention above, but never really took the risk and followed it whole heartedly. Maybe I should have.

I should have probably said by now I am not giving up on teaching -- afterall I just applied for my teaching credential. I really do like teaching. The feeling when a student finally understands something is amazing. The excitement and thrill that comes with 180 students that look up to you is a rush. The thought that you are impacting lives is cool. You really do hold so much power as a teacher and can turn a student on or off to learning- it works both ways. I find I love the difficult kids- I love English language learners- I love the behavior problem kids (as long as you don't give me too many in the same class where they become unruly). I like the lesson planning sometimes when it flows and when it works. I love the teaching of course, which is why I am going into this. Do I think I'm wrong? No.

I guess where my frustration really lies, and what I told Mike about the other night stemmed from our debate where we are at opposite ends of the spectrum. These are everyday reasons that go through my mind that worry me.
- I am scared as a teacher that test scores will determine our fate- as a young teacher I feel like a target. There are those that will argue as long as you teach, you will be fine. They don't take into account the unruly kids, the kids who perform very low and you move from below basic to basic in their skill levels
- I don't buy that argument "as long as you are doing your job the kids will do theirs" - You expect the kid who might dislike you, doesn't take your performance seriously, the major behavior problem kid, your really low special ed kid to perform well and make sure you keep your job?
------- I know alot of these issues go into teacher performance and I'm not going to argue how/what what way I believe teachers should be tested- I just want to throw out my concerns
- When salaries are on the line and based on performance it has yet to have been made clear how teachers in low performing schools will be impacted, but the consensus seems to be we will never get raises, and that's the kind of school I see myself at.
- Awful administrators that are out to target you- it comes with any profession.
- Teacher pay - Mike seems convinced if teachers weren't unionized we would make $125,000 a year
- Continued slashing of teachers pay- my parents have both taken close to 10% decreases in pay over the past 2 years
- The great backlash against teachers- surely the number of good teachers outnumber the bad
- Backlash against union rights like collective bargaining - it is about rights
- The fall of unions? What about our representation/lack thereof from the unions? Who will represent us? What will happen?
- Abuses from administrators/districts/lack of representation from unions
- The expectation from parents that we should/it is necessary to spend/spend our own my to make our classrooms run. Do they do that for their jobs?
- The pay cuts teachers have already taken... are there going to be more? Is it going to get better? When? Am I going to be able to live modestly? Have a nice car, house, be able to take vacations
---- My pay is important to me because it is about my personal happiness
- The grading
- The pressure to perform
- Anxiety - so many teachers I know are on antidepressants/anxiety meds due to the stressors.
- The fear I'm not good enough
- Teaching is for the bottom of the barrel/housewives - I've heard this from Mike and many others
- The pink slip in my first several years of teaching
- Not knowing what the future will bring as far as teacher pay, respect, reforms, unions, etc.
Many of these arguments you'll probably say come with any job, but again, these are reasons I worry about becoming a teacher... I've been through a lot already in my short teaching career, and it hasn't always been easy. There are a lot of challenges being a teacher which I enjoy, then there are others that I detest, which at times have made me hypersensitive to many of the issues teachers face.