Here is the transcript of an email conversation with my sister about where to eat for our graduation dinner since she was too busy/refused to do it in person, meaning in the same room as me. She claimed she was busy, didn't have time, and didn't care. Obviously she did care. But look at her attempt to rub her intelligence in my face.
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Hi-
Hágame un favor y pick out your top 5 restaurants from this list.
The smaller ones like Carolina's, Roman, and Zena's all have high reviews on yelp.com
BJs
TGI Fridays
Old Spaghetti Factory
Lucille's BBQ
Taps Fish House
California Pizza Kitchen
Roman Cucina
El Torito
Olive Garden
Yardhouse
Buca di Beppo
Cheesecake Factory
Red Robin
Tony Romas
Bubba Gumps
PF Chang
Carolina's Italian
Zena's Mediterranian and Lebanese
Mrs. Knotts
Mimi's Cafe
Sent at 1:48pm
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Me: Can you please reply soon?
Sent at 5:32pm
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Sis: Not with that kind of attitude, no.
Sent at 5:33pm
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Me: Please suddenly implies attitude? AN ATTITUDE WOULD BE REPLYING LIKE THIS. Mom and dad want an answer soon.
Sent at 5:33pm
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Sis: My phone was dead and I didn't hear it ding. I'm working on an essay and editing at the moment. And yes, saying "soon" usually implies attitude.
Sent at 5:34pm
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Me: Where do you want to go?
Sent at 5:35pm
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Sis: Your an idiot cuz you don't understand attitude. You really are a stupid English teacher. You should look it up in the dictionary. You need to look up stupid and attitude. You wouldn't know. I would. Being a Speech major I know these kinds of things. Speech major usually helps you get to know the way people talk. Speech majors also have the hardest courseloads and hardest professors. You didn't. I had Dr. G and Dr. C who were the hardest professors at school. They graded you on spelling and grammar in writing. Your professors didn't. They graded you based on how you dressed. They graded on how well prepared you were for your speech. They graded you on how well you presented. They graded you based on how fast you talked and you couldn't go over or under. They said speech majors are the best.
TGI, TGI, TGI, Knotts, Olive Garden
Sent at 5:39pm
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Me: Obviously they didn't grade you in the use of you. You is used in informal language. I can assure you, hun, they weren't grading me. And your professors apparently never picked up on your redundancies.
Sent at 5:42pm
I got the last word in. Heh.
5 comments:
I used to think you exaggerated how awful your sister is. Now I know this is not the case. I think you need to try to find a good job so you can get out of your family's house and away from your sister. The sooner you can cut ties with her, the better.
Mike: I have to give you credit for putting up with her bull shit. If it were me, the list would have been way shorter to choose from since overloading her with choices was bound to cause difficulties since she can't multi-task.
Also, for next time, if she doesn't decide on the first go around, choose for her (with agreement with your folks). That's how I handle my younger bro when he can't decide on things, just bypass the road block.
She seems to love pushing your buttons, if you don't fight back, all the enjoyment she gets from needling you is gone. Sometimes walking away from a fight is the way to win.
I kinda wanna throttle her . . . speech majors are the best? Haughty much?
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