I called and texted The Guy Sunday morning. I texted about 9:45 and didn't get a response, so I called him at 10:30. We talked about him playing WOW and then I mentioned near the end of the convo that I got my box from DHL to ship my computer back to Apple. He said great, come on over to get the Macbook Air from him.
I was on my way by 11 and at his place around 12. He opens the door when I arrive because it is locked. Then he tells me that Jeff is on his way over because he forgot his computer last night when he was over playing WOW. I said that's not a problem because he asked if it was. We sit down and play WOW. I have to play alone because The Guy is in an instance with Dan and Alex. While sitting on the couch the conversation isn't as good as it usually is, but there is talk about our need for the really unhealthy pizza place he likes... not the one I got him the gift certificate to as an apology. I was trying to think of a way to bring up the gift certificate. I hadn't yet given it to him and I didn't want to bring it up and make a big deal like "HEY! I NEED TO APOLOGIZE!" I wanted it to be subtle. Jeff called a couple times in the midst of this and The Guy called Jeff finally. The Guy had an idea- Jeff would come to The Guy's, then he'd go to the pizza place, then on the way back use The Guy's gas credit card and get gas for his car. Jeff agreed that was a good idea.
Josh calls a couple times while we're sitting on the couch, but The Guy doesn't answer, then blows him off in texts. They were supposed to grab lunch, but The Guy told Josh he was feeling anti-social and was going to stay home alone all day. Then finally after Jeff arrives back with the pizza calls and says he felt bad, didn't mean to blow him off like that, and to come on over. Josh arrives at 3p.m. and The Guy explains he felt bad for ordering pizza when Josh eats so healthily. Josh did have a slice of the pizza and snacked on snow peas.
The 4 of us sit watching "Emma," "Harry Potter II," and "The Hulk." We take a break after Harry Potter for more pizza and a real dinner. The Guy warms up some leftover meatloaf, brown rice, green beans, and some bean soup he made. We stand around in the kitchen talking while he does this. Then The Guy asks if we want some wine with dinner. Before Josh had arrived there were NUMEROUS sexual references and I knew this was apart of the plan. We all agreed. Jeff talked about how he doesn't drink, but this peer pressure is going to cause him because he is now in a business club and to socialize in the future he'll need to learn to drink wine. We stand in the kitchen eating at the bar and talking about how The Guy wants to redo his kitchen.
After, we go back to watching "The Hulk" and play around on our computers. All 4 of us were there playing WOW. We only did 2 instances and we died both times because we didn't have a healer. The Guy couldn't heal and tank. Jeff and I were mages. Josh was a hunter. We gave up and The Guy set out to delete everything from his brother's computer to give to Josh. Josh is leaning close to THe Guy during the movie and The Guy says he is going to make us brownies. I was thinking I'm sure there will be something else in the brownies too... no... there wasn't... He goes into the kitchen, melts the chocolate, gets the flour, sugar, and sets out to make his brownies. Jeff tells him no, that's so bad of him, and Josh succumbed and rooted him on and said he could have a cheat day, plus they were homemade.
All afternoon The Guy's dog was wanting to get up on the couch, but THe Guy kept yelling, I did too, as well as Jeff for him to mind and get off the couch. He'd try to climb up in between us. Finally The Guy told him NO and the dog growled. That was enough for The Guy to put him in the dog kennel for the duration of the night. He doesn't want the dog to be under the impression he is entitled to the couch- too late.
Anyways, after the movie is over the brownies are ready. Jeff avoids them. Josh and I each have 2 squares. THEY WERE DELICIOUS. Very airy and chewy. I'm not a brownie fan to begin with because they're often hard and really heavy feeling. Josh talks about how even though he is eating those, he'll be out tonight running, and working out in the gym tomorrow. The Guy joked since he didn't have milk we could have some alcohol to go with the brownies-another reference to getting Josh in bed.
We decide to take the dog to the park to work off the brownie and let him get some exercise. The 4 of us trot over there and talk about the fires in the area lately and try to confuse his dog and get him to run after each of us. He ran after everyone but me. Dang.
We get back to The Guy's place and Jeff takes off because it is 11p.m. The Guy asks what I'm going to do and he asks if I mind taking off for some alone time with Josh. I said sure. I asked him for the Macbook Air and he tried to explain to me how to transfer my files over to it. Then Josh asks if I'm taking off and I said yes. They both were going back to play WOW on the couch.
As I was leaving I really still wanted to tell The Guy sorry and not bring it up again later. I didn't want to hand it to him and make a scene, but I wanted him to see it and so I put the white envelope with the card on the counter near the door where there was a box of trash or something, but also his car keys. I laid it close enough to that so hopefully he sees it.
Coming home I had to stop at Stater Brothers for a few things for breakfast and lunch this week, so I make a quick trip there. My total is $23.64 and I pay with the $30 I had in my pocket. The Guy asked earlier if I had money when he was searching for some. I looked in my wallet and found there was $30. I also had to stop for gas. I went to Arco, which I loathe. I prefer to gas up at Shell because there is no ATM fee and also because I tend to get better mileage out of Shell gas. Yes, I believe Arco is low quality gas. I only went there because my gas light was on and my car said 16 miles to empty, which would never get me home, and I didn't know how accurate the car was. I am at the kiosk trying to get the card reader to accept my credit card, but it doesn't. I had to use credit instead of ATM because I have no money in my checking account because of some favors I did for my parents. I was in a panic because I was worried about not getting to the next gas station and my credit card wasn't working. Arco apparently doesn't accept credit cards. Every other gas station does. Anyways, I am standing there in a panic and I think to myself "just text The Guy, ask to borrow his gas card" since I was still close enough to his house. I started out my text and thought screw it because I can't ask him for money. Part of my text was sent- another reason texting is evil. He gets a text that says "my cre." I end up remembering that I had the change from Staters in my car and I put the $6 toward gas to get home. The Guy calls me and asks if everything is ok. I said now everything was. He asked what happened and I explained Arco didn't accept credit cards, no money in my ATM, which made me feel bad because I didn't go into the whole story about why I was at Arco and how once he sees the card will know I had money, or will think I did something drastic to get that gift certificate when he already knows I was in a money bind/still am. The money bind has been solved for the mostpart- my mom is picking up the tab on my credit card because of this, but The Guy doesn't know this, and with me giving the gift cards makes me seem like I was shopping for attention. Not the case. I know I'll probably end up telling him. He says not a big deal and next time I see him that he doesn't mind giving me his card. I said thanks and ended the call. I burst out crying after. I just felt so bad. I was kind of propositioning The Guy for money. I don't ask my friends for money- that's something I don't do. I feel like a part of me was lost for sinking that low. I know The Guy was totally ok, but I still feel bad. Then it didn't help that every sad song on the radio was playing and it just furthered the tears. I heard "Always Be My Baby" by Mariah Carey, "I Wonder" by Kellie Pickler, and "Skin" by Rascal Flatts- songs that never made me cry before, but tonight, just touched the right place. I don't think I've mentioned this anywhere, but the lyrics of "Always Be My Baby" remind me a lot of The Guy and I...
"Always Be My Baby"
We were as one babe
For a moment in time
And it seemed everlasting
That you would always be mine
Now you want to be free
So I'm letting you fly
Cause I know in my heart babe
Our love will never die
Noooohoh!
... while The Guy and I might not have a love that will never die, I hope it is a friendship that will never die. We're also both free to pursue others and he was the one who wanted me to be free...
"I Wonder" - Kellie Pickler
I think part of the reason for all of this crying was that I'm tired. I haven't slept more than 3-4 hours if I'm lucky in about 3 weeks. Part of it is nerves- especially last week when I felt so bad for treating The Guy badly. The other part is things have come up- I never expected I'd be running to the hospital at 11:30p.m. last Thursday night to comfort my friend Steve and not get home until 5a.m. because I sat with him all night after his mom's car accident. Friday night I just couldn't tune my brain off, and all night bingo last night didn't help. Brain is in overload right now, I'm upset, I'm horny, I'm stressed, and so I'm blogging.
Edit: Slept ok last night, but woke up several times after 5a.m. I ended up calling in sick at 6:55 this morning so I could sleep until 9 this morning before going to school, but then had that on my conscience... haha... not a big deal, though. Only thing about that is I don't get paid.
Nothing happened with Josh apparently last night other than THe Guy and him talked. He found my card about 10:30 this morning and texted me to say thanks. Great!
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