Monday, January 25, 2010

What will it take?

What will it take for me to find a normal, sane guy to date? Why do I keep coming up empty handed? What is it that I lack? These are questions I have asked myself over and over after these failed dates. What is it? Is it some vibe that I give off? I wonder on a different note if it is some vibe I give off to attract all of these crazies. Is it something that I say? Rarely has being out came up on the first date, and I understand that could be a deterrent. Is it something that I do? I have critiqued the date the other night, as I do with every other date to see where it is I go wrong. What is it? I feel that I have so much to give and so much want to spend some time with another individual whom I can date, but it hasn't happened yet. After each date I still feel like such a novice in wondering what I lack to take it to the next step.

Just some thinking out loud...

On another note, bad date texted me a good morning this morning and asked when we would be getting together this week because he had a proposal for me (and my bedroom) because I mentioned in a conversation that I was trying to figure out what to do. Of course he texted that would mean him coming over. Um. No. Um. I never showed you my bedroom. You will not be coming over. I have no interest in showing you my bedroom. I don't need ideas from a disturbing guy. I hardly think you know what my bedroom needs without ever seeing it- and really don't want your suggestions. I feel kind of bad I never called him and told him I was no longer interested, but um, no, he's not coming over. That's that. Um how weird is it to text a guy that you went on 1 date and haven't heard from them in a week, and invite himself, and say that he's coming over to your house?


Anonymous said...

Well, being mr. cloested, I'm hardly one to advise on dating issues. To me, the gay world I've encountered is hook up oriented. Of course, the fact that I've conducted a closeted life led to me meeting people off personal ads and services and that probably leads to hook ups more then relationships.

Just hang in there, hopefully you'll find someone where you rock each other's world. Until then, just have fun and enjoy being yourself as you hit the clubs/bars/internet.

On the other guy, I don't know what to say but maybe you should somehow tell him your not interested and hopefully he'll fade away. I have a feeling he won't get the hint otherwise...doesn't he kind of seem like that type? Don't take my advice though...Let other's with more worldy experiences and experience chime in. My advice here might suck.

Anonymous said...

I don't know how many times I've offered to go on a real date with you young man. :P Then again, I AM veritably insane, so maybe it's best you keep your distance and we stay friends. :O

On the other note here, this guy makes my ex look like the most sane person on earth. No wonder he's still single at 42. Oops, was it 48? :P

Aek said...

I have no answers for you. But yeah, that's just odd. :-/

What about second date guy? He seemed promising. :-)

El Genio said...

Adamn4Adam kinda seems like the wrong place to look for sane guys to me. Maybe I'm incredibly biased though.

I promise there are sane guys out there, we are just hard to find ;)

JC said...

There is nothing wrong with you. Don't you dare begin to believe that about yourself. If you do I will simply have to drive all the way out to CA and kick some butt.

Seriously, just give it all some time. I know that is rather ironic coming from me, but it will all work out.

Keep your chin up, my friend.

Mike said...

Closet: Aaaw... I always do like to hear what you have to say.

James: Next time! 48 may be more like it!

Aek: We've been chatting on AIM

El Genio: I couldn't agree more about a4a and definitely don't put everything into one basket. That site is more for amusement than anything. I am not the hookup type and I haven't found quality guys there.

JC: I didn't think it was me- I just don't know why it doesn't work out- or would like to think. I am thinking positive.

Shawn said...

Your problem, if you even have one, is you live in the Inland Empire. There's just not as good a selection of men out there, as there is in a larger more population condensed city. Being gay out there is hell. I lived in Corona, off Indian Truck Trail, for 5 years and it wasn't until I left that I realized how miserable I was. Gay life out there is as dry as the dusty dirt the trucks pick up as they zoom down the 15 fwy.
My husband and I live in Seattle. Really, if you want to have a large selection of men, you need to go to the city and get out.