FRIDAY Got to Mike's about 3:30 and we headed to get his car at the repair shop. After the repair shop we go to Chilis where we have great service- bartender remembers us from a few weeks back and was awesome. We have the nachos and chips/salsa. We go back to his place afterward and watch the TV we missed from the week like Top Chef Desserts. We both fall asleep on the couch.
SATURDAY We got up at 7 or so. Mike had to rearrange his flights for work and so he does that while I watch the news and play with the kitties. He comes in when he is done and we take turns showering. He spends the morning cleaning and doing clothes- I had offered to help, but he refused. We go to IHOP for breakfast since I had a gift certificate. The food was mediocre at best. I had the Nutella crepe.
We drive around town after looking at the councilman's house and exploring random neighborhoods. We go back to his place and watch TV. We head out a little later to get groceries for The Guy's party. We get mushrooms, hummus, spinach and artichoke dip, celery, and carrots- a few other basics. I pay for all that stuff. We decide to do stuffed mushrooms with spinach and artichoke dip and hummus with carrots and celery. We go back to his house and have a glass of wine while we arrange the food.
We head to The Guy's about 4pm and get there at 4:30. It was pretty fun. We walk in and there is a lot going on- everyone is in the kitchen. We set our food out and the party is on. The Guy explains the rules- it was a themed night. There was picture taking, judging, then you got to pick your pumpkin, and then you carved your pumpkin. The pumpkins were judged, and those with low scores had to sing for their life. Mike and I stayed pretty reserved mainly sitting and chatting on the couch. We made comments and jokes about random stuff like The Guy's decorating, his walls, and the queeny people at the party. We take our photos together for the judging part of the competition and I had a pretty awesome photo- I got to pick the 3rd pumpkin. Mike had an advanced design he was carving and it didn't turn out so well- his pumpkin caved in- but he was the one ahead of everyone telling them how to carve their pumpkin. He was awesome! The judging started at 8 and our pumpkins were ready to be judged. The Guy was the judge and he shouldn't have picked the ones he did to win. The winner was Zach, his best friend, whose pumpkin was late for the judging. He just did a generic happy face. The gal who did the intricate wolf in moon design should have won. I should have been 2nd, but I was 3rd. Zach won an iPod nano. Runners up got a $25 iTunes gift card and those who had to sashay away got $15 iTunes gift cards and candy. The event was pretty fun, although Mike was mad I didn't win and The Guy picked his best friend. Before we left, The Guy, said how nice Mike was and how happy he was for us.
We chat all the way home about the people there and The Guy's decorating. We both fall asleep on the couch.
SUNDAY
Up about 7 to go to Kohls and go to breakfast. WE head to McDonalds. We chat about random stuff like my cousin moving out here from Oklahoma. Mike buys several pairs of socks on clearance at Kohls. We head back toward his place and again do some exploring on the other side of the tracks. We watch some random Bravo show he Tivo'd while I lesson plan for the week. I am feeling hungry, so we head to a sandwich shop that he heard good things about. We wonder why... it wasn't that good. We watch some more TV and relax. I finish reading "The God Box" by Alex Sanchez, which was a pretty good story. I went on gay erotica downloading binge after. I have lots of new readS. Mike asks me if I want to go to New York to visit him for the holidays with his family. Yes. OMG. A New York Christmas!!! CAN IT GET ANY BETTER? I AM SO EXCITED TO MEET HIS FAMILY AND POSSIBLY SEE SOME SNOW... LOL.
We go to Loosill's BBQ for dinner and shop around the mall afterward. We went there since my bf wanted a veggie burger. We had a good time just walking around the mall. He bought a sport coat and polo at Banana Republic on sale.
We go back to his place and he packs for his business trip. We head to bed about 10:30 watching Old Christine.
MONDAY
He is up at 6 to shower and head off on his trip. I wake up at 6:30 and rush to get to work. I got out of the house about 5 minutes than earlier since the shower water was already hot, which was nice since I needed every minute at work today. Crazy day at work. Good day, but crazy.
LOL... there's sooooo many good titles for this post, but so much to talk about.
I have been like a rockstar the past 24 hours with a limo, good food, drugs, my entourage, and good music.
I get off work yesterday and have a text from my cousin asking me if I want to go to Disneyland. I said "we'll see," but didn't give her a definite answer as I was just getting home and had a few things in my mind from work that I needed to deal with before I could think about going. About this time around 3p.m. I get a call from The Guy, which totally perplexed me. Friday, date night, and I get a call from him. We chit chat for a moment and then he asks if I want to go to see Margaret Cho with him, his boyfriend, and Jeff. Zach was supposed to go, but was sick. He told me to meet at his place at 5. I have a few errands to run since I was suddenly going out for the night, and run those. The Guy calls asking if I can pick up Jeff since he is mostly on my way. I said sure. That made me a little late getting to The Guy's at 5. It was a pretty cool drive with Jeff. We found stuff to talk about, which doesn't always happen. We talked about the new DMV licenses and how long it takes to get your license now in the mail.
We pull up to The Guy's house and there is a limo outside of his wing of condos. Jeff jokes there's our limo. I said with some hesitance, in a funny way, "of course!" Jeff and I walk in and the party had started long ago. All you could smell was pot. I run to the restroom and everyone takes a few hits, then the entourage heads out. We all have on our jeans and black zip down jackets. It was pretty hot. I was kind of stunned this whole time- we're taking a limo to a concert? Who does this kind of stuff? Apparently The Guy did this a few months back when the 4 of them went to another concert.
I sit next to The Guy, which is just because of the order we got in the limo. He suggests we move seats so his boyfriend could sit next to him, and that was alright with me. That put me in the DJ seat. I got to control the radio. I found 1043 MYFM and they were playing Katie Perry's "Teenage Dream." We had a serious discussion about Katie. We give her a lot of props. She has really catchy songs, which is why we like her. Her music is also so happy. A lot of the music pre-Katie was sort of a downer like some of Pink's stuff came to mind in the discussion like U+Ur Hand- we like the song, but it's a downer. Katie's stuff is all happy.
The Guy and Robert trade seats with me to adjust the air in the limo, which we were having a hard time doing. Then I started really having a blast. They asked me what each song was that was playing on MYFM. I am the musical guru- I know it all. The Guy asked who was playing as it came on and I told him it was Daughtry's "September." He told me how good I was. Apparently there was a RDS display to show in the limo. I told him I was. I said I was like Shazam. We talked about the 90s movie Shazam and debated whether it was Sinbad or Shaq in the movie- I said Shaq- and after googling it discovered I was right, just like Shazam. I identified and kept everyone abreast for their listening pleasure of what was playing- we heard Pink's "Raise Your Glass," "I Ran," by Flock of Seagulls, "Photograph" by Nickelback, Santeria, "Live LIke You're Dying" by Kris Allen, and some "Stay" by Lisa Loeb.
We were also belting out the songs as they came on, and the rum and coke/Pepsi in the limo helped all of that happen. Jeff had 2 half rum and half diet cokes and was wasted. We talk about how we need a sunroof to stick our heads out of, and we were so having an AbFab moment where we thought we might have to just use the emergency exit as a sunroof.
We get to The Wiltern about 6:45 and we are let out by our limo driver. How fun was that getting out and being stared out like "who are we?" That was fun. We decided we were The 4 Boys if anyone asked.
We wait outside the Wiltern for a few moments, but the line was sooooooo long and Jeff and I had to go to the bathroom so bad. He flirted with the cashier at Dennys to let us use the bathroom at Dennys. It was hilarious in the bathroom- Jeff used the urinal and SO I went in the stall to do my business. I didn't close the door and Jeff felt he needed to protect me from any guys who wanted to rape me- that's how I knew he was gone. LOL. My teacher bladder as I call it was full and I was taking a really long time, and Jeff was becoming increasingly worried that I would be raped.
We get outside and The Guy and Robert are about to walk in. We walk in and make our way to the snack bar for the M&M bag cookies and to the HRC booth for = stickers and our Legalize Gay shirts. We get those, make our way upstairs to our seats, and then Robert and I head to the bathroom. While on our way he asks me about an acquaintance we both have in common and we talk about other random friends. SOOOOOOOO FUN AND COOL THAT HE KNOWS THE SAME PEOPLE I DO. The people he knows are much more of the party people and very much on the party scene, but I know them as I did go to school with them. We go get more M&M cookies, then head back to our seats. I get back to my seat and Jeff wants me to go to the bathroom with him. I go with him and he comes out of the bathroom telling me how worried he was I would leave him and he'd have to "rely on the kindness of strangers."
We get back to our seats and the show is about to begin.
The opening act is pretty funny- John Roberts opened and he wore the wig seen in this video and used many different wigs to tell basically the story of his life and all the different types of girls you meet. It was pretty funny.
Oh, and the Margaret clip above was just at the point where it was kind of getting funny. The joke between The Guy and everyone the rest of the night was about the olive oil squirts and bombs it makes. We were all laughing pretty much the entire time. The ending was good- she had the LA Gay Men's Chorus on stage with her singing one of her songs. Yes, Cho sang and played the guitar, and even sang country. She has a good singing voice.
Back in the limo we decide to just head home. Again, I am Shazam, and I provide all the song titles. We heard some Hella Good from NoDoubt, Apologize by One Republic, and a few others. The Guy's boyfriend has a high voice like mine, but dang, he can belt out a tune pretty well. I'm jealous. The Guy talks about what a stoner he has become and how he is constantly high. I believe it. He talks about pot brownies, lollipops, and all sorts of other things he can now buy.
We get back to The Guy's place about 11:30. We are all hungry and he orders 3 pizzas from Round Table while encouraging everyone to do pot with him. Some did... let's just say some people there were higher than a kite by the night was over, some people were really touchy, others became very feely. I had some good and interesting conversations with everyone I do have to say. I enjoyed discussing all of the celeb gossip with Jeff- are Jake and Taylor meant to be? It was a sight... everyone was still friends today. I shudder as it was not a scene I really like to be around mainly because pot possession/being under the influence of pot could cost me my teaching credential just like that. I was so exhausted by the time things were winding down as it was about 2:30a.m. and didn't feel like driving Jeff back to his place- his actual house- not where he was when I had picked him up earlier in the afternoon, so I sort of told him I am spending the night. I just laid back on the couch and closed my eyes. I felt really spacey trying to fall asleep- I think it was just me being uncomfortable about the whole situation. I felt bad for not taking Jeff back to his place, felt bad for staying with The Guy, and other stuff like that. Gah, guilt. Part of it was my fault for being a little adventurous...
Robert has to go to work at 5:15 and I move my car from behind his so he can go to work. I fall back asleep until about 9. It was 11 or so before The Guy began stirring. He had awaken about 5:15 to do the dishes, light candles, and say goodbye to his boyfriend. I just laid on the couch and dozed.
At 11 or so we got up and ate some leftover pizza. Jeff and The Guy played WOW while I played on my phone. We watch some "Law and Order SVU" and "House." I had never seen "House," and let me say I HATE IT. House had some good 1 liners here and there, but he's the kind of guy I just want to slap because he is so unproductive. The Guy was taking hits all day. It was pretty relaxing. The Guy's boyfriend gets home about 5 and plays WOW for a few hours before everyone decides they are hungry. He says he'll make chicken enchiladas, so The Guy and he take off to the store to get the ingredients. He makes them in the kitchen while everyone hangs back watching "House." The enchiladas turned out pretty good. He used a green sauce, and a can sauce instead of red sauce. They were mostly gringo enchiladas, much different from my chicken enchiladas, but they were good. La salsa con tomates helped make them good.
After we eat it is 8p.m. and Jeff wants to head out. Yay! The Guy gives me my Christmas gift- its a little box- I'm guessing an Apple TV, but I'm not sure. It could be anything. What we do know (Jeff, Robert, The Guy, and I all determined) is that it was bought on amazon because it was professionally wrapped by amazon. We discussed our lack of wrapping abilities- well, except for me. I can wrap. The Guy said everything he orders on amazon this month regardless of what it is is being giftwrapped because it helps put him in the holiday spirit, and for $3.99 each item it is a good investment. LOL. I wish I'd brought my gift for The Guy since he had mine. I'm sure we'll meet again soon and I can give him mine.
Jeff and I head out. We talk about AUX ports in cars and how some have them, some don't. As we are heading through Fontana the traffic in the fast lane starts to slow. It slows a couple times and I get nervous as people may have not been paying attention. I see a car swerve from the fast lane to the center divider area to the right lane. This guy was all over the road. I was 3 cars behind him. We follow him for about a mile, then Jeff says he'll call 9-1-1. I'm glad he did. Apparently the guy was probably very drunk and we were not the first to call. We get a call from a CHP officer as we were driving and he asked where we were because he was using us, who eventually passed the drunk driver for our safety to gauge where we were so he could go pull the guy over. I was surprised though how far down the freeway the officer was in relation to where we were when we made the call. I guess that's simply because of who was available and in the area, but I can assume they got the guy. I hope.
I dropped Jeff off and told him I had a great time, then took off. I got home about 9:30.
Great convo, great friends, true friends, good memories, and a night of laughter. What could be better?
My friend from school on facebook commented how my life is so boring after I said I was going to go see Margaret Cho in a limo. lol. I love how my life is so unpredictable. I have those moments sometimes where even I don't know how my life will be in 5minutes because I may be suddenly doing something totally different and going somewhere different.
And so completes a successful weekend with The 4 Boys!!!
The Guy messaged me on Saturday morning asking if I'd pick up Jeff as his birthday present. I knew I was going to be asked, and so I said it wouldn't be an issue.
The Guy and I spoke a couple times Sunday before I went to pick Jeff up. I was early on my way to pick up Jeff, so I stopped at Ashley Furniture and ran into a coworker, talked, and that was perfect because The Guy needed me to stall in picking Jeff up for a surprise which I later found out was Jeff's cake. They were in the middle of trying to put it together.
I get to Jeff's at 3:45 and meet his mom since he's now living at home. She was drunk. She has been like that for the past 5 days according to Jeff. We gather all of his laundry and head over to The Guy's. We talk in the car about random stuff- him living out there, his birthday, and listened to the music in the background courtesy of KIIS FM and 1043 MYFM. We listened to some Material Girl and other random stuff. The Guy tells us we need to pick up pizza, and we do so.
We get to The Guy's at 4:30. Zach (The Guy's best friend) and Robert (The Guy's boyfriend) are there. I bring in the pear cider and we all drink one. A friend of Jeff's shows up a few minutes later. We all drink and eat the appetizers The Guy bought and made. The Guy made some delicious 7 layer dip, which was not as good as mine, but still really good. We ate some artichoke spinach dip, veggies, and a few other things. We also had some pizza. We stood around as Zach talked about being drunk, alcohol, being Mormon, and snapped pictures of everything. We retreated to the couch and listened to Faith Hill in the background, talked about how we all have a love affair with Faith Hill, even if it is a closet love affair, and how she has great thighs. Hahahaha.
There Will Come A Day- Faith Hill
We sing Happy Birthday to Jeff and he is surprised by his cake. It is made of a rice krispy bottom, ice cream, brownie, M&Ms, a tiara, and a wand. Bonus points if you can identify the type of character, or this character looks familiar to you as you have been killed by Jeff's character in the game.... hahaha
Robert had to take off to get a few things, so we all watched the pilot and 3-4 episodes of the first season of "Modern Family." It was pretty funny. I've seen a few episodes here and there before. Zach takes off during the 3rd episode and Jeff and I have to wait around for his clothes to finish in the washer and dryer. The Guy and Robert retreat to the office where they are getting high. They took their little vaporizer thing they bought at Home Depot because they couldn't go to Target or Best Buy because of the controversy over political donations. The pot smell doesn't linger with that vaporizer, so you can "smoke" in the house. They were both out of it within a few minutes. It was funny. They played some WOW, I played on my phone, Jeff played WOW on the couch next to me. The Guy was getting tired about 9 and went to lay down. Robert stayed up and looked at videos on youtube, we friended each other on facebook, and we shared funny facebook status messages. My friends were overdramatic last night. One friend "had a tough weekend and needed Jesus Christ." Another friend was having an FML (fuck my life) moment where they realized they had to sell their Dodgers tickets for some game this week. About 10p.m. the clothes are done. Jeff puts the clothes in his basket, and we hug The Guy in bed, then hug Robert and take off.
Jeff and I had a pretty good conversation in the car. I told him about my interviews, he told me about how he has a great job with few hours designing business cards, but has so much down time all he does is play WOW. He told me now he is tempted to go back to school since he is 26 and can finally finish his degree since his parents refused to pay for him to, and he made too much money to get financial aid. He has a year and half to go for a chemical engineering degree. I told him that was pretty impressive and encouraged him to. I told him about Rick, as he had texted me while we were driving. He encouraged me to ditch and ignore him. We get back to Jeff's about 11. I help him with his laundry in the car, wish him happy birthday, then we hug, and say goodbye. He jokes that he can't wait to hear about Rick and I getting together.
The Guy and I had talked several times this week via phone and text. He called me Wed, Thurs, and I called him Friday a couple times. We agreed to met up at 6 after he got out of the doctor.
I get to The Guy's at 5:50 as he is in the shower. I made great timing considering it was get away Friday, and holiday traffic. I hang out in the office on the couch while he showers. When he gets out he showed me why he went to the doctor. He has a form of psoriasis he was trying to get cleared up. He told me this was like a maintenance visit to the doctor since he was getting all of his problems cleaned up and taken care of. All evening The Guy was incessantly putting cream on his spots and telling me how much they had gone down already- it was funny. We talked about how great his house looked since he had his house cleaned yesterday.
We hang out in the kitchen and living room walking back and forth just admiring how beautiful his house was. He also went in the bathroom a few times to look at his mirror that takes up an entire wall that was just installed. He looks like he does have a designer bathroom now. We talked about what to eat, and I was really craving something with chicken and cheese. The Guy said sushi because it had none of those. Sushi actually sounded REALLY good, so he said we would phone an order for some in at 7 when the place starts delivering. During the time we wait for the sushi we admire his house, talk about his health, tell him about my mom's surprise party being amazing. He chats on facebook with Jeff and Jeff has a mission for us.
The food arrives and The Guy puts it in the fridge. We go to complete Jeff's mission- we have to pick up a package he accidentally left for a realtor in the city The Guy lives in- Jeff forgot to put address labels in it. I drive since I pulled in behind The Guy's car since Robert's car was there since The Guy took him to the airport. All 3 of The Guy's exes are in Chicago this weekend- what a coincidence- none know each other, though, and all are into older guys. We have a hard time finding the realtor's office- Jeff doesn't know the name, and Jeff is directionally challenged. The Guy proclaimed to Jeff I'm like the king of u-turns. I must have did a half dozen while on our adventure. The Guy makes a really nice comment about how he enjoys hanging out with me for being so easy going. Whether we go out or stay in I'm ok with whatever, and I can get excited about whatever. That was cool.
We also debate whether or not this song sounded country- The Guy said it did- I disagree and provided him with a plethora of information. I said Daughtry was on American Idol, known for singing rock, this is his 3rd rock album, he toured with BonJovi who is a ROCKER, so Daughtry is ROCK. His influences include Rod Stewart, Bryan Adams, Elton John, so he is ROCK.
We get home and stand in the kitchen eating the sushi. It was the healthy kind, but it was really good. It was all pretty spicy. I'm not sure what we ordered- some hibachi I know for sure.
The Guy talks about wanting to install his speakers in his kitchen, so we head to Best Buy to get speaker wire, an Airport Express, and a few other odds and ends. We spend some time looking for cords they didn't have. I drove, and The Guy said how he liked being chaufferred (sp?) around for a change. We also talk about how Robert is different than all of his prior relationships. It really sounds like Robert is different... lol... I hope.
We get home and The Guy chats with Zach and a few other people online. We make random comments to each other about what is on our mind. Fun times.
The Guy and I hang out until about 10p.m. until he decides he is about to head to bed.
I got a text from my cousins earlier in the day about meeting them for some country line dancin', and I was so down. I made my way out to Brandin' Iron in San Bernardino, and it was not crowded at all for a Friday night. My cousins were standing around drinking, so I got a drink, and was soon loose enough to head out to the dance floor. They were mainly doing couples dances, and my cousins didn't want to do that, although I would have been ok. Once the band was done, which could not have been soon enough, since they were not that good, we hit the floor. I am getting better at line dancing. Here's what we danced to last night, and I did an ok job. Oh, and all my cousins sang Two Pina Coladas by Garth Brooks... soooo funny! Only my cousin, Brit, knew it, and my other cousin just bobbed her head.
While I have the electric slide down I still need to work on these 3 dances... the Bocephus line dance
the Watermelon Crawl, which we did 3-4 times last night
the tush push
I really would like to become good at line dancing. We have a line dancing club literally a half mile from my house, and I could get in for free most any night. My grandma was a member there for over 20 years, and she had a lifetime transferrable membership. She used to get all dressed up to go square dancing and line dancing down there.
The Guy told me he would take me out to celebrate my passing the CSET. I was excited as I said in my last post because we've only eaten out together a handful of times.
I get to his place at about 5p.m. and he is listening to the WOW Blizzard speech about the new WOW expansion coming out next year. We sat listening to it for about 45 minutes. It sounds like a lot of cool new features like they are getting rid of mana and going to have some sort of instant regeneration.
The Guy has some pics of a new guy open in a window and I catch a glimpse. It is a fellow WOW player who is gay that lives in Michigan. He came out after something that made The Guy and his friend Dan mad the other day where someone was using the word "fag" quite liberally. The Guy and him kept talking, texting, messaging each other on myspace, and stuff like that. The Guy will be going to Michigan to see another Dan (not the regular guy he plays WOW with, his new crush) September 20 for his birthday. Suddenly this is the guy for him. He at least is more independent than other guys. For a moment The Guy offered to have him come out here, but this guy said NO he didn't feel comfortable having a stranger do this for him, he has to pay his own way, etc. The Guy respected that and appreciated it. Anyways, they're together and The Guy had his last fling last night before he settles down with this guy. Who knows. He was really giddy about it tonight.
The Guy gets ready and asked me where I want to go. I said I didn't know. He asked if I was just here for the experience, to be with him. I joked that was part of it. He said he had an idea of where we could go. Then he asked about ordering a pizza and picking it up. I actually had just had pizza at happy hour with the teachers and for lunch. I didn't want that. For a moment it sounded good, but then I realized it didn't when he asked if I was sure. I said we'd dine in somewhere. He said he had ideas.
The Guy had me move my car and I told him I was excited to finally go for a ride in his new car. He asked me what I'm doing with my car, whether or not I am going to get XM/Sirius put in the car. I want to. I really do. I love XM/Sirius on Direct TV. I love the 50s-90s stations, The Highway, The Pulse, The Blend, 20 on 20, Love, and Escape, etc. I can't really afford $12 a month. I told him I am strongly considering it. First, though, I want to upgrade my car speakers. After hearing mine compared to his I realized what a difference and how bad these factory speakers actually are. The Guy told me for $250 some good ones and he'll hook me up with the people who did his. I told him that's my first priority.
We make our way into the eatery area of town and he does a U-turn. He says he wants Thai. He asks if that's ok. He asked if it was ok like pizza was ok. I laughed and told him I'm down. We go in the parking structure and all the spaces are only 20 minutes. He jokes about how all of the spaces are only 20 minutes and if I could eat fast. I said I could do two 20 minute spaces because I'm a slow eater.
We park and head down to the Thai restaurant. We go in and The Guy asks if I want him to order since I don't know Thai food. I looked at the menu and confirmed it looked pretty. He ordered. The Guy told them to give me a Thai iced tea, which was really good. Then he ordered some pad Thai with shrimp, chicken curry, beef and chicken skewers, something with eggplant, and another shrimp dish. He talked for a good 5-10 minutes about his new guy Dan. I listened and said how he does sound better than Josh. I heard the whole Josh story and how Josh went off on Jeff the other day. Jeff just delivered business cards to Josh at work and Josh went off on him telling how he is now outed because Jeff showed up. Jeff is somewhat gay acting, but there is no way that he was outed by Jeff showing up or could be associated with The Guy like Josh proclaimed. We talked about how Josh will probably be back. I just said to IGNORE HIM, GET ON, MOVE ON, YOU ARE HAPPY.
The Guy told me I needed to start talking or he was just going to keep talking. I told him about my trip to Mississippi since I hadn't had a chance to yet. I told him how my friend was ok with me being gay. I told him about what we did and stuff like that down there. He asked what made my friend come around and I didn't know. He asked how my new college is. I told him it seems super easy. He has taken classes there and said it was. He said he should go back with me and get his teaching credential. I said he should- it would be easy, we could keep each other company, and it would be fun. I told him how I've been subbing a lot lately. I told him how the bad kids were transferred to the continuation school at the end of last year and the campus is very different this year. I told him how I haven't had to raise my voice at all in any class and the kids are actually a thrill to teach. I had a difficult year last year subbing. It wasn't that I lacked experience, but the kids were very difficult, and in one class in particular that I subbed in it was just like policing all day. This year with the bad kids gone it is not like that. I told him about how I am actually excited about going to work in the morning. I told him about how I had a great discussion with Linda's kids the other day about geography. I wrote keywords up on the board Linda wanted me to discuss (mountains, desert, etc.) relating to Cali's geography, and how the kids were so receptive, interested, and respectful. I just listed these places, then asked the kids to name cities and things associated with each, tell me how far away they are from where we were, and things like that. The kids had a great time with that and I got such a thrill standing up there and just being a facilitator. He told me how that was really neat. Finally he asked about my health and I told him about how this morning I had a difficult time, how I've had some scary moments, and how my mom's friend, who is a nurse, really scared me. I told him I have some upcoming appointments and how it is just the waiting and unknown that is making me worried and I know how bad that is, but I'm keeping myself occupied and I am able to basically live normally minus the stuff going on. I am just dealing with it. He was joking around when I was telling him, which shows me that he was really in a good mood. We talked about Chris and he said to ignore him, I don't need him. We talked about how to approach guys in a club and how The Guy is an expert, yet I'm not. We talked about my lack of confidence with the 3 guys from the town hall meeting at the bar last night.
He thanked me near the end of the meal for coming out and visiting with him. He told me how it was so nice since he never went out with Josh. He told me Josh would never eat Thai. I told him I really enjoyed the meal and being with him. We talked about how Zach, Jeff, and I are all friends who require so little of The Guy, yet he never really invests in us like he did Josh, and felt stupid. He said he was so appreciative of my maturity and ability to care for his dog, and how I'm just one of those people who is there for him, and he loves that.
In the car on the way home The Guy said how much he loves his new car, how smooth the ride is, and things like that. I asked him about halfway home if the car had seat heaters. My ass was getting hot and it was all of a sudden. It was weird because it was 80 and humid out, yet my ass was getting hot and I didn't know why. It did, and mine was on. The Guy played with his, but realized he wanted his back warm, not his ass.
We go in and talk some more about odds and ends, then set down to play WOW, or in my case update WOW. I did help The Guy enchant some of his gear, then he called it a night since he was tired.
He made me promise in the restaurant to take all of the leftovers home, and I did. We hug several times as I'm getting ready to leave and call it a night.
I wasn't expecting The Guy to be so playful, but it was definitely a nice change tonight, and I'm not sure I was exactly. I was definitely in a more serious mood and I think it came across... haha
The Guy asked me to house sit this past week for him since he was going to SF for his birthday. I said sure.
The Guy and Zach leave early Friday morning. We text each other back and forth several times that day about whether I got in OK, what I was doing, things like that. He also texts me 3-4 times to tell me he left $100 in the fridge for food since had nothing.
I get to his place about 8p.m. Friday night and am overcome by the smell of his dog. His dog doesn't smell bad. Well most of the time he doesn't, but my allergies were heightened for some reason that night. I put the comforter from the bed in the dryer to air it out and make it smell better. While sitting on the couch I realized the comforter there, as well as all the pillows on the couch smelled like dog or stale. The Guy's house doesn't smell that bad, and he isn't a complete slob, but well, it is allergy season and my allergies are horrible. I just gave everything 20 minute spins in the dryer, which did the trick. I could breathe again. I did however have a couple bad allergy attacks this weekend.
I was there for about an hour when The Guy calls. He said Jeff was on his way over. Jeff showed up a few minutes later and wanted to use the internet. He was going to work on his website, ended up playing WOW, and then his friend Jeff came over, whom I've never met. Jeff and I ended up watching the Star Trek trailer and after he declared he was cumming over it we needed to go see it. We decided on the theater and then when his friend Jeff showed up we took off. We got to the theater 45 minutes early, which was nice. I saw my mom's former boss and so I talked to him and told him about my mom's ordeal at work and all the problems with that. I wanted to hang out with Jeff and his friend, but it was cool to see my mom's boss because he is going to try to help her out. We talked up until the movie was about to start. We go in and I swear we cummed for 2 hours. It was just so hot. The action. The guys. Captain Kirk. The movie lets out at 12:40a.m. We all go back to The Guy's place and watch dumb Lady Gaga and Britney videos until 3a.m. I sort of kicked them out, or nicely told them I was tired because I had to get up at 9a.m. It was weird hanging out with Jeff since we've never hung out together like that without The Guy. It was really nice of him to include me, though, and made me feel good.
Saturday I had to go to Chinatown in LA for school. Didn't enjoy my trip as much as last time when I went to LA. Did snap a few shots and did enjoy it overall. Went to the mall after near The Guy's house and walked around. Treated myself to some Spanish paella for dinner. I snacked on pot stickers later that night at The Guy's. I got a call from Chris, some random guy I've been chatting with on connexion. He wanted to meet since he was bored and lives near The Guy. I said sure. We met at Chilis where we had endless chips and Diet Cokes. Then we had cheesecake for dessert. I ate so much and felt so fat. We spent close to 2 1/2 hours talking about iPhones, technology and school. He seems like a cool guy.
I get back to The Guy's place and I was horny. I was also kind of tense because I was beating myself up over some stuff. The Mike who made the Gary Busey comment had called me and I didn't pick up because I wasn't going to play any games and didn't want to hear what he had to say. I didn't do any homework like I'd planned. I needed to relax and it was late. I decided The Guy had some frozen strawberries, raspberries, tons of strawberry margarita mix and tequila. I needed a nice strong strawberry raspberry margarita, which was quite good. The Guy also had tons of poppers laying around. No joke- he has 3-4 bottles in the bathroom drawer, 3-4 in the kitchen tool drawer, 3-4 in the computer room, and a half dozen bottles in his bedroom and for the hell of it I decided to get high. And I did. And so that was that. The margarita was good, I watched some porn on The Guy's Apple TV, got off, and yes, got high. It was a good night and I was much more relaxed afterward. I was also thinking The Guy is probably out getting drunk or stoned, so why don't I? I'll feel better. I was right. Talked to him today and he was doing both.
Mom's day was pretty good. My mom loved the summer dress and cover up I bought her. It was brown with coral flowers on it and had a coral cover up to go with it. We ate at Sizzler since sis will eat there. It was packed.
Forgot to leave the key for The Guy's house so had to make another trip back to his house, which just put me in a bitchy mood. And he was tired and wanting to sleep, further putting me in a bad mood. I understand he was tired. I just didn't want to have to turn right around and come home. Oh well, I'm in a good mood right now. Chatting with the guy Chris that I met last night at Chilis.
The Guy and I both are on antibiotics this week. You may remember we didn't hang out Tuesday because of his bronchitis and my sinus infection. I'm still on the antibiotics and so is he. He feels fine, but he is still experiencing painful chest coughs.
I called him about 1 today. I tried to talk to him 4-5 times yesterday as he was out jogging. Probably not the best thing, but he hadn't eaten healthy and felt fat. He was also sick. He called about 2p.m. and I talked to him. He told me about being sick all week, I told him about my week, and stuff like that. Josh called last night. After he said that he broke down and became uneasy. He asked what I was doing and I said nothing. I was at home enjoying the aloneness. I told him my dad had been home the past 3 weeks. He has been off work because his blood pressure was so high the doctor put him on a mandatory leave. It was nice having my dad home to an extent, but it became intrusive. Picture Mrs. Doubtfire cleaning, vacuuming, cooking, plus yardwork, and secretary. My dad would come in my room and say, "I'm running the vacuum, want me to vacuum yours?" It was nice, but um.... well... I missed my space. He said well, I should come over. I agreed I could because I do have a pretty good immune system and I'm still on antibiotics.
Get to his house about 3:45. He asked me to stop by CVS to pick up his happy pills. I get them and they didn't make a fuss, which surprised me. He called while I was there and told me they didn't have the cough syrup he needed. He did want Robitussin DM. I looked and couldn't find it for the longest time. Someone put the lone bottle on the Alka Seltzer making it hard to find. I found Robitussin CM. I also found generics like Saratussin or something like that. He said "screw those" and I joked how I knew he wanted the full effect brand name. Then he wanted to know the flavors. They aren't listed on Robitussin. The only thing I taste about Robitussin is it tastes nasty. I buy the big giant bottle since it is on sale and take off.
Get to his place and say hello, then he goes to open up the Robitussin. He takes some while I go to the bathroom and he tells me it tastes bad. He said I was going back later for his doctor's cough medicine she prescribed. I laughed at him and his complaints.
We sit down and watch some movie that was a wannabe Kung Fu thing with Chinese people. The Guy joked how he could totally speak Chinese and said random jibberish and told me how it was right. I told him he was so good. He agreed he was and had the inflections down.
We make small talk about things going on. I tell him about seeing Aaron and how Aaron thought my friend Carl was cute. I told him how Carl is butthurt that I am not interested in him and how he is calling me giving me drama. We joked how we should both go out drinking and smoking (NEITHER OF US SMOKE- JUST TO MAKE IT CLEAR) to calm down and how we both have differences in guys we like, but we still can have a commonality. Case in point when we were looking at hot guys on myspace later in the evening. I thought one was hot, he didn't, but we always found a few we agreed on.
I talk to my cousin Kat who calls while I'm sitting on the couch. Rumor has it I'm graduating. She wasn't the first to know. She wasn't going to be. She is a distant relation- my aunt's extended family. She wanted to know what I was doing, when, she wants tickets, wants to know if there was going to be a big party. I said low key to my parents. My parents want to do something big, but basically with the economy and things like that we agreed low key. I have a feeling we'll wind up with a big family party, which is ok, but not what I planned. I love how I'm not the one planning my graduation and she is the one who wants to, or finds it important to know. The Guy bascially laughed and sided with me- go small because of the economy.
Zach calls while the movie is on about 5p.m. since he just got off work. The Guy told him about the one guy he really liked at the club I was at last week. The Guy went Thursday night. I was actually going to be there then with Carl. Anyways, this guy hasn't returned his calls. He talked about Navar and then some guy MIke he has also fucked that are potentials. Navar is only 19. He was texting him back and forth also. Anyways, he told me about the Josh thing. Josh called to say how he has no reason to apologize and calling was apologizing. He has been through so much. He used the line that "if The Guy really knew him, he would know what Josh wanted." The Guy was civil and basically Josh has turned to pot, smoking, drinking, broke up with Jackie, is hanging out with his 1 gay friend, went to 2 gay bars, and still doesn't know if he is gay, but doesn't think so. The Guy just encouraged him to get counseling. The Guy talked about how well he handled that and listened to Zach's guy stories. The Guy talked about how strong he has been (because of friends) and how he took action and assessed the situation, is in therapy, has a new trainer, and stuff like that.
Shortly after Zach is off the phone Josh texts. He goes crazy. I can see it in him. He tells me how he knew it was going to happen. So instead we look at pics of Navar on facebook since The Guy friended him. He had 250 pics we went through. Then we played stalker looking for the Mike guy, or maybe his name was Nate. Anyways, we looked for him. The Guy did name searches, area searches, then friends who might know him on myspace. We went through several friend pages looking at hot guys, and one of the guys THe Guy knows is dating/married to a hot guy named Steve I went to high school with who I always knew was gay. We talked about how small the gay world is and everyone knows everyone. I saw that with how The Guy knew this friend, who was married to Steve, who knew a bunch of guys The Guy did, guys I had seen on myspace, out in clubs, or stuff like that. Fun times. We do that for probably an hour. At the end I show him my myspace on my iPhone so he can see the 2 guys I'm interested in.
While all of this is going on we're watching "10,000 BC" and The Guy talks about how the music is from King Arthur's Court, how it is such a typical movie with a father figure, a dad relationship, and the typical jungle stuff. We made some funny reference. I wish I knew what was going on, but suddenly the white guy being chased by all the animals, main character ended up in a group of natives. The Guy said it is like "The Jeffersons." Then he started singing the song or something, then suddenly they were up in a hut or something and I said, "that's the deluxe apartment in the sky." He agreed. Then the guy took some food and ate it. He said, "oh yum," or something like that. I said "Florence!" in my best George Jefferson voice (because Florence is the maid who was always being yelled at by Mr. J). That was pretty funny.
I swear "The Jeffersons" is one of the best shows because it is so applicable to everything, it is in pop culture everywhere, and things like that. I know 3-4 times before The Guy and I have also sang or done random things like this related to the Jeffersons, but they're cool.
So The Guy asks if I will run to CVS. I said sure. I drive up there, park, go in, and they laugh when I am back at the pharmacy. They didn't refill his prescription, though his doctor called it in. 15 minutes they said. I texted The Guy and said "Are you hungry? I'll bring dinner- my treat." It was my treat for all of his help with my computer a week back. It was my treat because I haven't paid for dinner in a long time since it has been Jeff and I there most of the time when we are hanging and The Guy is volunteering to pay. I ask where to go since The Guy texts back "healthy." He names places at my requests and I told him to decide. I go to a sandwich place he mentions. He wants a turkey sandwich with no mayo, no cheese, but avocado. I order that for him and a roast beef with arugula for me. The woman who helped me was a little Chinese lady who was just so sweet. She was asking me how I was doing, and just really sweet. I get the food, then drive back to CVS. I talk to The Guy on the way who decided he needed candles larger than tea candles for a new candle holder he bought. He changes his mind 5 minutes later when he calls me again when I'm at CVS.
I get the food and prescription, then go back to his place. He is vacuuming and cleaning up. He has lit candles. He wants to feel better. His house smelled like Vicks Vapor Rub all afternoon. It wasn't bad. Anyways, we sit down and eat and watch Bill Maher. Sarah Silverman is on. She's the one fucking Matt Damon. She just broke it off with Jimmy Kimmel, by the way, again. So he eats the salad and half of his sandwich. He then does his testosterone shots while I finish eating. We stand around and make random talk about stuff. Then he decides he is tired and wants to shower and go to bed. We were going to hug, but then realized we need to keep our distance.
I thanked him for everything and he thanked me for picking up the prescriptions. I left about 8:15p.m.
I hope this post makes some sense- I may have been smoking some pot while typing it. Nah. I'm just scatterbrained right now, mind is wandering, nerves, thoughts, horniness, worries, stress from school, and things like that are all contributing factors.
I called The Guy Saturday afternoon and texted him. He got my text several hours after I sent it and a bunch of random texts. I don't recall what they were about, but nothing as scandalous as what my sister sent out. Not sure what is going on, but he called to confirm it wasn't me. I told him I was free everyday up until Wednesday and would love to hang out. He called me back sounding genuinely interested saying he wanted to hang out. I texted him yesterday morning about 10:35 asking him if he'd like to hang out today since he had mentioned Sunday. No response- no big deal. I texted him about 12 or 1 I think asking him if he could please reply and let me know if he got the text since my text thing has been weird and I'm not sure who is getting what. He called maybe 15 minutes afterward and asked what I was up to. I told him on my way to Victoria Gardens to go to the Apple Store for a power cord replacement. He invited me to stop on by after I was done if I had time.
So I drive over to his place. He is laying on the couch watching a biography/movie on Beatrix Potter's life. He told me how he was watching sappy movies. He was playing WOW also. Jeff called maybe 30-45 minutes into me sitting there. The Guy told me to answer his phone. I did- Jeff was wondering if everything is alright. I said yes, he was playing WOW. Then The Guy had me put it on speakerphone so he could talk. Jeff wanted to see he was doing OK and The Guy said he'd like it if he'd come and play WOW. Jeff shows up probably an hour later. I get my computer shortly after, then patch for the game, and run around my own in the town of Stormwind. I was completely lost and forgetting how to get out of it. I told The GUy I couldn't remember and he reminded me to hearth to get where I wanted to go. Made things much more easier. Jeff laughed and then The Guy made fun of him for having a hard time and still learning to play also. YAY. So The Guy and Jeff quested around together since both were level 73 or so. I was only 65 and needed to be 68 to get to the area they were. I didn't like playing alone, but being there with them made it fun. We watched "Saved," "Serenity," and "Sex and the City Movie" while sitting, playing on the couch. I hadn't seen the Sex and the City movie. We play for almost 7 hours- from about 2p.m.-9p.m. We did take a break and spent lots of time wondering about dinner. We talked about sushi (hehe), steak, and a few other things. We finally decided on steak and rice from an expensive restaurant up the street from The Guy. He ordered and I went to get it since I wasn't questing around with him and Jeff. It was about $24.00 for each of us and there was little food. The Guy joked he could do this because he wasn't supporting a freeloader now.
It was fun watching "Sex and the City" because there were funny parts, but we were also deciding which characters we were. The Guy is Carrie- he is a writer, he has lots of boy troubles, a great group of friends, and he has the quick witted remarks. The Guy's best friend Zach is Samantha with being so straightforward about everything, "wax much?" I thought I was Charlotte- everything is a fairytale, very romantic, happy ending. The Guy said that was Jeff, which I highly disagree with since Jeff seems more like Miranda to me and we argued about that. The two of them decided I was the gay wedding planner in the movie.
There were a lot of jabs at Josh while we were sitting on the couch. First, before Jeff arrived he talked about how he wondered if this was over. I told him it probably wasn't. I'd hope Josh would come around to apologizing. He cried asking me about what he could have done differently being cornered by Jackie and how it was basically a no-win situation.
Jeff left about 9p.m. when he had a friend coming over. "Sex and the City" was in the last 30 minutes and I knew he would break down. He did. He told me how much it hurt. How there was no closure to this; how if Josh came back, he would readily take him back; how he is going to therapy now and hoping to grow from this situation. He talked about how he wonders if Josh will come around, if he misses him, and things like that. The Guy talked about things like how worried he is about going back to his old weight. He broke down when he talked about things they did together, how hurt and rejected he feels. He cried about how he tried and really feels deep down he has done nothing wrong. He talked about how he spent $20,000 in 6 months on him (he only makes $4,000 more per year than that). He talked about how he was living on pens and needles throughout this time, yet he was happy at times, but had so much anxiety and worry about what Josh was doing. He talked about how he helped Josh with school, work, family, friends, and everything was just there for him (protein powder, school books, shakes, clothes, money, etc.) He talked about how he added Josh to his health insurance and now Josh has health insurance, but he is unsure whether to cancel it; he said he probably won't. He was tracking Josh's cell phone usage (remember- he is on The Guy's plan). He noticed he kept getting a call from the 626 and some from Fontana. He was calling these 2 people repeatedly. He noticed Josh hadn't been texting and I told him it takes a while for texts to show up. He was debating as to whether to cancel or what. He said he may today. He was worried Josh would come today demanding all of his stuff back and he was thinking what would make him hurt the most, what to say, and things like that. He said he was hoping this wouldn't come because it would be like the end. He talked about how he does have no regrets. He talked about how everyone hates Josh, especially his brother, parents, and Jeff. In a couple questions he asked about Josh's treatment and dealing I think I provided some insight. I talked about me almost being forced to come out because of my Aunt in Nor Cal, when I met him I was just exploring my sexuality and could have been outed, things like that, and how The Guy was always there, always supporting, and he has that comforting thing to him, so I would have never have treated him this way. If I were in a relationship and outed because of it with The Guy I may be in a panic for a few days, but then I would have picked up my phone and called him. I talked about how a couple times I've felt like I've really fucked up our friendship, yet I am on the phone within a few hours or so to apologize because I don't want to lose him because of all of his support (monetary and emotionally). He talked about how he feels Josh is at a real loss because he knows that he does enhance all of his friend's lives, though he isn't perfect, may be lazy etc.. I completely agreed.
After this, we settled down and watched a little bit of "The Mummy Returns" until 1:00a.m. or so. I was exhausted and falling asleep when we called it a night. It took me about 30 minutes to get home. Not bad.
I've been so stressed lately with things going on in my life. I broke down and went to the psychiatrist last night at Kaiser. My doctor has been so staunch and refused to give me more than a preventative anxiety medicine. I have the anxiety meds and I feel so calm. That knot in my stomach is gone- the knot that has been so prevalent for weeks and months. I'm just literally amazed. My myspace status today is "I feel human again." I feel extremely mellow despite the events of today. I kind of like this!
I have been busy at school as the quarter just started. I think I have my classes picked. I'm only halfway looking forward to one of them, but I have an awesome schedule (10-12 on W, F and 10-12, 2-5 on Monday). I'm keeping optimistic- I am going to tackle the schoolwork head on, I only go 2 hours and back to back on W and F. I know I'm pretty much guaranteed a "B" in my Spanish class.
I got a 3.56GPA last quarter. I had 2 A's and 1 B. Dean's List... 3rd time... woot!!! Now if my GPA would rise above a 3.4141414141 I'd be ecstatic. I'm happy I have the Dean's List thing to brag about, though.
Work at the high school has been going well. There are going to be major budget cuts due to the Cali State budget crisis and my boss may be faced with laying some of us off. She assured me I have seniority as I've been there 4 years with Gonzo, so I won't be on the chopping block. I'm rarely there, which is another thing working for me, and she doesn't want to lose my expertise. She is working looking for alternatives including making sure all of my coworkers like Darla, Joe, Marci, etc. can get other in-district jobs at other schools with the same program if needed.
Subbing has been going well. I'm subbing for Linda, my mom's friend tomorrow. She is having eye surgery for blurred vision. Payday for subbing is Friday!!! WOOT!!!
And remember I was talking a few weeks back about needing to branch out in what I wear? Well, how's this? This is what Gonzo's idea of that was... she bought me this shirt for my birthday. It is a t-shirt with unicorns, dinosaurs, and other things on... I'd wear it to the high school... but I'd wear it on a cold day where I could put a jacket over it... I love that she actually bought me that, I laughed, and thanked her for it. Then I said I'll wear it to work one of these days, so I guess I am going to do that. Well, stuff like that does appear to be in right now. All of the guys are wearing zipped jackets with odd, juvenile patterns like that.
I know we need an update on The Guy and so here it is. We have talked a little bit off and on lately, but I've been bitchy and he has been too. Josh is realizing how condescending his girlfriend is and Josh and The Guy seem to be back to their little love affair. They had the best New Years Eve together as Josh bought The Guy a USC hat and went over to watch the football game with The Guy, Zach (the guy's best friend), and Justin (Zach's friend). We're going to get together this weekend probably to celebrate my birthday.
The past 2 days have been miserable. I am not going to go into tons of details, but my dad had his surgery the other day. My dad broke some bones in the upper part of his leg that the doctor had to operate on and repair, as well as cut out some inflamed tissue that was causing him excruciating pain up and down his legs and back. There was good and bad to the surgery. Good in that the surgery went ok and that he should be able to walk in a few months after physical therapy and other things. Bad in that he is very loopy, even today, because his blood pressure is so low. He spent the day at Kaiser with my mom. I spent almost all day at Kaiser yesterday with my mom and sister waiting for my dad.
It was 7p.m., and nearly a 7 hour surgery before my dad had woken up and the surgery was complete and we could pick him up. I call The Guy about 6p.m. and he asks how I was holding up. I told him how bored I was and he said he felt really bad because he knows I really needed someone and he wasn't there. That hurt me badly. I was feeling fine most of the day and was pretty strong throughout the whole procedure even though it was a very serious procedure. I just told The Guy it wasn't a big deal. Then I texted him telling him how I felt bad that I didn't call when I needed someone to lean on. He was going to dinner with Jeff. He had been going to take Josh out, but Josh broke plans with The Guy to go with Jackie. They went to PF Changs.
I get a call about 8p.m. from The Guy asking how I was holding up. I wasn't holding up well. I picked my dad up at 7p.m. or so, then we weren't in my car even 5 minutes when my world came crashing down. My aunt in Nor Cal did something that was so rude, so hurtful, and just so bad. It made a difficult day even more difficult. My dad and I get to the restaurant where my aunt and uncle are, then eat. We eat at Norms. It was disgusting food. I will never go back. It was so bland and dry. Anyways, dinner constituted my dad being extremely forgetful and asking the waitresses name over 30 times. That was the only thing going through his mind. I had to tell my mom about what happened, which broke her down, but what my aunt did could not wait no matter how things were just trying to get back to normal. Then my aunt and uncle had to hear that, which made it more difficult because of the money situation, but also because they're just as sick and worried as we are.
We get back to my house and my aunt and uncle come to help my dad. The conversation then turns to money. They see our newly carpeted bathrooms, then my sister says "well, you should see Mike's room; it is bare and it has nothing in it, but he wants a new $3000 bedroom set." Thanks sister. Then she says that I'm the greediest child because I just dropped $300 at Banana Republic and the only reason she knows about it is because my dad made an issue about having to buy all of that stuff. He owed me, though. Thanks sister for embarrassing and humiliating me in front of my family. The whole reason the money issue came up is because now we're having to pay even more for a lawyer (and we've paid close to $50,000 already); we are currently remodeling our house; and because my mom's boss doesn't like her, he cut one of her classes forcing her to take a 20% pay cut. My parents were talking about how this can't continue and how they've tapped into their retirement etc. etc. This stuff worries me because it is their future, but also money is so tight every month, and I don't ask for a lot, but dumbass sister makes it sound like I do. My uncle kept saying he'd give money whenever needed, but that's not the issue. The issue is what my aunt did.
The Guy called at about 9p.m. and I tell him how my world just came crashing down and everyone is so worried. We knew this would happen, but it was a matter of when. We have to act by MOnday to do anything if there is a chance, but my aunt could be in a lot of trouble. Anyways, I tell THe Guy and he asked if I wanted to get out. I did. I ask if I could spend the night because I'll just be turning around and house sitting for him this weekend. He says fine as long as I don't mind sleeping on the couch. I didn't.
I pack my weekend bag because I was going to be house sitting for him when Josh and him go to Vegas for Josh's birthday. When I got to his place there was a balloon and vase of flowers. Josh stayed the night Thursday night, then Friday The Guy and him both had to get up early. The Guy was trying to overcompensate because he broke up with Jackei the night before.
I tell The Guy my problems about why I was feeling so bad being a target of my sister's. He told me to snap back, only focus on the future, not to question her ideas, or give my sister any power by that. It is so hard when I feel so bad because I don't feel like I ask a lot from friends (like The Guy monetary-wise or for things like him to hang out with me like it would have been nice Friday). Then I don't think I ask a lot from family- I may splurge on clothes once or twice a year, same goes for big items. The Guy didn't seem to understand. I was fed up and wanting to walk out. I told him I was going to. He finally said he's not helping. He said he can't see any of this. Still, today, he doesn't know how much his dad makes. He always, always had money. He gets his parents hand me downs. His parents are well off. His parents never ever mentioned the word money- it was just always there, so he doesn't understand what I'm going through but feels so bad because it is eating me up so much.
We talk even more and I talk about how my aunt's actions are also hurting me because of the emotional attachment to what she did, then the worry about the future, how things will play out, money, and things like that. Again, The Guy wasn't very open and he was just telling me to get over it, but it is so hard. I gave up and told him forget it. He didn't want to, but I said YES and with a little more talking I was better able to explain how I felt.
Again, we talk about friendship. He talked about how this is eating me up and it pains him to see how I'm so focused on the past. I don't think I am. I was just questioning whether my sister's points were valid, and again, he didn't see that. We talked. We talked about friendship and how we aren't always there for friends and how he understands how I was hurt and even a short text would have probably meant the world. I understand he was in a spiral because Josh broke up with Jackie, then when The Guy got home in the afternoon Jackie was at The Guy's house and Josh and Jackie were suddenly back together.
We take some Tylenol PM to sleep, then call it a night at 11p.m. or so.
We both wake up at about 8:30. The Guy plays some WOW, then we get ready about 9a.m. He asks if I have gas in my car. I said I didn't know. He tells me how he still doesn't know about the watch. I said NO. I told him to keep it for later, give it to himself, etc. He didn't believe me. He called Zach. Zach didn't pick up, but calls back a little bit later and says that Josh has done nothing. The Guy tries the watch on and says it isn't him. He'd want one with a metal instead of plastic band. The Guy says he doesn't want it. Zach says to do it after all he has done, as a little reward that he is still sane after being so caught up in everything. He agrees. In the car as I drive him to Ralphs he takes pics and texts Zach and sends the pics. Zach approves of the watch. The Guy also talks about how he is not sure why he is doing all of this for Josh. He never does this stuff for Jeff, Zach, or I. That was reassuring and I was glad he realized it.
We go to Ralphs so he could get snacks for the trip up- carrots, strawberry smoothie, pitas from Pita Pit, ice, an ice chest, and some other stuff. All healthy. The Guy tells me how he has an itinerary for the trip he made. It is about 10 pages with a picture of the roulette wheel, Vegas map, then a schedule like the trip up, what they'd do every minute etc. I told The Guy it was really cute, but definitely overkill. He said he wanted to give it, then tear it up. I discouraged that. He said I'm right- it is his fear about everything like the future and having to have it planned out and be perfect. The Guy gives me his Arco gas card and I go and fill up my car. It only takes $18 to put 9 gallons in my car. HOW AWESOME IS THAT?
Also on the car trip we listened to Gloria Gaynor's "I will Survive," "More Than a Woman" by the BeeGees, and "Chasing Cars" by Snow Patrol.
I drop The Guy off to get his rental car. I wait a few minutes, then he texts saying all is ok. I drive back to his place. He rolls up a few minutes later in a black 2008 Cadillac CTS. He rented a car for Josh and him. He was upset it wasn't a Mercedes or Infiniti and protested, but it was a pretty nice car. He packed, showered, then I gave him my iPod cord (car charger and AUX adapter) for the Caddy. He looked good in the Caddy. No joke. Black shirt, black sunglasses, black hair, haha
He takes off about 12, and I do too to get food.
This afternoon I drove down to Monterey Park for food. That is a 30 mile drive, but I haven't been to LA in a long time and wanted to go. I went to a favorite Chinese food place of mine. Then I realized I was on Atlantic, which turns into Telegraph Road, which was near the outlets. The Citadel Outlets. I had never been, had heard about them, especially on HOT 92.3. I drove down there and it was a mess. Parking? Miles away. Good deals though- 2 pairs of Levi's for $45, a few gifts for my aunts at the Corningware/Pyrex store. Would I go there again? NO. It was junky, crowded, and not worth it. It made me sad. Leaving was a challenge because of the Christmas tree lighting ceremony at the outlets. I end up winding through the streets of Commerce and East LA and I do drive by The Guy's dad's business which was a neat feeling to see it in person, though it was nothing special; but also it just kind of made everything seem more real.
Pictures are acting funny, but if you enlarge you can see how junky these outlets appear being off the freeway in an industrial area. Why did I pet sit this weekend? Jeff wanted to do it for The Guy, but I knew I would want out of the house because I'd be going crazy. My aunt and uncle would be there for my dad at his every beck and call, plus too many people in the house would make it crazy. It was yesterday just being at Kaiser with everyone. My dad is doing ok tonight- he is stable- so things could change. But I knew I'd need a break. I was going crazy and the thing that happened with my aunt does effect me, but I can't really do anything to help. I had no clue this would also happen, but I knew I'd need a vacation and pet sitting for him was a vacation. I am there for my family, but this weekend I wouldn't have been much help.
How much did The Guy spend on Josh? $25 money clip $100 iPod headphones for Sunday afternoon when The Guy meets Josh's parents for lunch $300+ rental car $325 hotel room at Bellagio $100+ I'm guessing very conservatively on dinner at a sushi restaurant in the Bellagio $20 flowers and balloon $1 card $330 for 2 tickets to Phantom of the Opera
The Guy and I had planned to hang out on Tuesday, but Josh I later had an emergency. He failed his EMT test by 1 question and was really bummed. The Guy made him brownies, took them to his house, then they proceeded to make out for a while. Then Tuesday night they went to a basketball game with some trainers from the gym. Tuesday afternoon was a no-go. I was a little frustrated, but I knew we'd hang out for a nice long day Thursday. I'm also glad it was today because we cleared the uneasy tension that was in the air. We planned that today we would hangout for a few hours to talk, then he'd go to his exercise class at 6:30, then Josh and Jeff would come over for some WOW.
The Guy is one of those friends who I can tell when something is wrong. I can tell it in his voice and over the phone the past week or so I have experienced it. I knew it was all because of Josh. Josh, for those not keeping record is his personal trainer, the straight guy, with a girlfriend.
I texted The Guy after 1:30 when I got off work that I was on my way. He said that was perfect. I get to his place and he is sort of engrossed in the new Warcraft expansion pack. He had just got it an hour ago. Zach calls him a minute or two after I arrive, so they talk for a few minutes. I feel the awkwardness in the air and I become bitchy. Why? Who knows... I know The Guy is like this because he is having a hard time. He tells me that in a few minutes I'll be ready to play. I say bitchily that I need the disk, then I need help, I need to know where to go in the game, what to do, etc. I ask that we install quest helper and other things. He jokes about how I sound so hopeless and I make it sound like it is all of his fault. I was joking, and he knew it. It isn't out of my character to be bitchy like that, but the tension in the air was bothering me, so that was my response I guess. The Guy brings out a watch to show me that he said he bought to give to Josh the weekend they are in Vegas. He asked if it was overkill. Zach said it was. I said yes. The Guy told me about his presentation. Josh is so worried about his looks, The Guy was planning to have him preen himself in front of the mirror like he usually does before Josh goes out and then say there is something wrong and bring out a Tag Heuer watch. He asks if I know how much it costs. I knew it was expensive because I know The Guy, but said no. He said it was $2,800, but he found it for $1,400, but he didn't pay THAT much even. I said that I think it could wait until Christmas.
The Guy wants to take a nap about 4:50p.m. We go in the living room and he lays on the couch. 2 minutes later he is up and in the bedroom. In the bedroom we talk about me being frustrated with guys and I tell him about the Starbucks date the other day. I joked around with him and told him about how I miss sex with him when we were in the bed together- we weren't close- just at opposite ends. I'd like to think it wasn't me being selfish, but my subconscience or something.
Probably 15 minutes later The Guy is up and says he is tired, but restless. We go out to the jacuzzi and he offers me some shorts to go in. I accept that offer. We get out to the jacuzzi and I continue talking about my frustrations and he understands. Then he talks about how he is so bothered with Josh. He loves Josh. He has fallen for Josh. He is so supportive of him. He is worried though he is becoming too overbearing and his ego is so worried about the future. He can't just be in the moment, but he's worried that he will lose Josh as a friend. He worries that he'll lead Josh on too much and just be hurt. He is worried and he looked like he would cry any moment. He says he just needs to not plan and worry about the future. We talked about how we sense when each other is worried about something wrong and that Josh does it for him, he can do it with me, and with Jeff. I told him how it just hurts me to see how he may be hurt.
Out of the hot tub and 45 minutes pass in there. The Guy goes in, hops in the shower, then I shower after him. He tries on bright blue workout shorts and a white t-shirt for the gym. I joke and tell him to quit changing outfits. He tried a gray top, then a gray top with floofies. I tell him to go with the white. He says it might be too dramatic of a change. The Guy also shaves and brushes his teeth. I tell him to quit obsessing. He says Josh does this for him too. I said look, you're going to the gym. Josh is going to see you one of these days where you're not at your best, so don't worry. You're going to the gym to work out also, and you are to be recognized for going. Most people don't look half as good as you do clothing-wise or body-wise.
He takes off at 6p.m. and I talk to Dan in OKC for a few minutes, tell him about Josh. He is skeptical about Josh having a girlfriend on the side and shocked at how head over heels The Guy has become.
At 7:15 after I get off the computer with Dan I get a call from The Guy. He sounded really winded and I told him that he sounded exhausted. I heard sniffles, then asked what was wrong. He poured his heart out to me that he was the third wheel tonight. He told me how Josh was all over Jackie tonight. There was a comment that Josh made to not worry about anything. The Guy saw how girls were fawning over Josh and how The Guy was definitely the third wheel and he was so hurt. He is better than being the third wheel. He is worried he is constantly giving so much and supporting Josh so much, and he wants to be there for him. I mainly just listened. We talk some more and I put the bug in his ear that you're asking a lot out of Josh. I just said in a very nice way that I was in the same situation Josh was- not out and not accepting my sexuality- and if when I met The Guy we were suddenly dating like this, it would have been very hard family wise and also for myself just accepting my sexuality.
The Guy gets home after getting pizza and he smiles when he sees I brought in the 3 WOW expansion packs he ordered. He stands at the counter and tells me he doesn't know. He is just so lost. He told me how special Josh is to him. He values him for his friendship, the spark he brings, the support, and the happiness. He is scared to death of losing those. I wanted to scream out "THAT WAS ME." That was me with him this summer. He said he didn't know how to present this to Josh without making it an ultimatum of The Guy or Jackie (Josh's girlfriend). We talked and I mainly just listened, but told him how I'd feel. I can see it from Josh's position and I think that's what The Guy needed. I felt really good to be able to talk and we talked about how you don't have to give Josh an ultimatum- just let him know how you feel. The Guy said he is worried of scaring Josh away with this and I said that he's probably feeling the same confused feelings. The Guy said Josh always tells him how strong he is. I just told him to talk it out and let him know how you feel because it is eating you up.
I ate 2 slices of the pizza and Josh calls. He senses The Guy is having a hard time and they say they'll talk about it. I hurry up and get my stuff packed to take off. We do hug a couple times before I leave. We hug in the living room, we hug in the kitchen in the dining area, and then over by the washer and dryer. When we're standing in the living room I tell him "thank you for being the kind of friend you want to be for Josh (in reference to the friendship, the spark he brings (making me want to do better, making me excited to talk to him, etc.), and happiness. He had a huge smile afterward.
The Guy and I chatted this morning about 7:30a.m. as he was driving into work. I had a tough night last night because of some "friend" issues and just my anxiety in general. Then we talked to each other this afternoon as I was in line at Chipotle trying to order my burrito. We texted this afternoon, then called, and decided we would hang out.
I get over to his place, walk in, and yell "HELLO!" Nobody responds, the dog doesn't come running. I think oh, they're in the office. I go in and see that wasn't the case. The Guy was laying on the bed and so was the dog. I pet the dog, set down The Guy's Macbook Air in the office, then come back and visit. I sit on the side of the bed with him and the dog and we talk. I told him about the friend issue again- thinking someone was your friend only to have them turn around, backstab you, and the trust issues. The Guy and I had talked earlier about how this person being older was able and in a position to do that. I thanked him for not being like that and how we are pretty equal in terms of our friendship.
The Guy says he doesn't want to sleep all evening, then not be able to sleep at night, so we get up. I had texted him twice telling him I had a case of the hungries and he didn't reply. He asks if I wanted some pasta he made. I said I did. He asked if I liked peppers, knowing how I don't like vegetables, didn't know if I didn't like peppers. I reminded him of the fajitas. I reminded him of our veggie convo. I do. He bought some red bell peppers, used some of the bruschetta from Halloween, sausage, olive oil, and pasta to create a delicious concoction. It was light, yet filling. The Guy dished me out a "Mike-sized portion." I don't know if I've mentioned it before, but we call the sensible portions I eat "Mike-sized portions."
We go over to the living room to eat it and turn on some "Last Holiday." It was just beginning, so we sit, watch it, and talk. He tells me about how he thinks Palin stands a good chance in 2012 and it scares him. We talked about how she is a typical American who doesn't know things like who is in NAFTA. He told me things are going well with him and Josh. They like to kiss alot. They've kissed, stared into each other's eyes, and things like that. Josh and The Guy grabbed a bite to eat today, they held hands in the car and both are becoming more affectionate with each other. He asked if I was ok with him telling all of this and I said yes. He told me about Vegas. He is taking Josh to see "Phantom of the Opera" in Vegas for his birthday, which turned into The Guy making elaborate plans like dinner reservations at some sushi restaurant in the Bellagio that Josh likes, then Sunday morning massages. It'll be a 24 hour trip. I said Josh was a really lucky guy and he smiled and thanked me for saying that.
The Guy and I talk about some of the dates I've had and how I seem really discouraged. I had talked to him this morning about how it is always the same guys over and over on things like connexion. I think there are more quality guys, but none that pique my interest. He told me how much personal growth I've had over the past 6 months to a year and how I am discouraged, but how it is good. He told me and asked if I wanted him to stop talking because I looked like I was going to cry. I was fine and told him to continue. We talked about how I should move/could move and that would be great. He recommended San Diego, talking about how all of the guys are so down to earth, how there are so many quality guys. There's so many bars- gay country bars etc. He said that he should take me just for the experience and so I can see and reaffirm there are other guys out there. He said we could take Zach and Jeff possibly, and that would make a good group. I said "well, we should do that for my birthday." He said January could work and that would be a good time. I said "let's do that." I'm going to hold him to that. That would truly make my birthday to have a little couple hour getaway, dinner out, get to go out a club with a friend, it sounds fun. I'm going to mention it in the future when appropriate just to remind him. I felt like this was the perfect opportunity because I was bothered- he's taking Josh to Vegas, where is he taking me? San Diego is a TON of fun and getting to explore the bars with him will be a lot of fun.
In the last 20 minutes of "Last Holiday," The Guy complains his house is dirty. I said it wasn't because honestly, it wasn't. Dishes and clothes aren't everywhere. He goes in and loads the dishwasher. I ask if he needs help and he says no. I keep asking if he wants help as he does other tasks. He gets out the Pledge and cleans all of the electronics and bookcases in the living room. He runs a load of laundry and feels better. He runs around doing little chores while we sit and watch 2 episodes of "Sex and the City," which I had never seen. I enjoyed them and we got some good laughs out of that.
We call it a night at 9p.m. and that is great. Now I'm ready for bed at 10:30- my usual time.
-------------------------------------------------------------------- Oh, and since I mentioned my midterms earlier in the week I guess I'll let you guys know how that went since I'm all about tying up loose ends today and updating everyone (Kaiser, the dates, etc.). - I'm convinced in my Spanish lit class as long as you can write a complete sentence, whether or not it deals with the topic you'll get an "A." Case in point- the prompt on this midterm was "describe the importance of a double text." This was one of those one-liner's in the book and I remember it because it was in bold. But what was it? Was this like double meanings? Who knows. I just wrote that there is an author and characters. The author creates the characters to explain a moral or lesson. The professor wrote "BIEN!" at the top of my paper and gave me a 100/100. The girl next to me wrote "Me gusta Caprerucita" and wrote a couple sentences about liking Little Red Riding Hod and also got 100/100. She got a "BIEN" on her paper also. - The curb on the linguistics test was pretty large. It was 61 questions. The class average was a 33/61. I was very worried because what was in the book, what he talked about in class, and what was on the test were 3 totally different things. I figured I got a D or C. I got a 37/61. The curb however was strange. 45-56 was an A, and only 5 people received A's. 40-45 was a B+ To get a B- you had to have 30-39. One person got 29 and that was a C+. My teacher said because it was 50% of our grade nobody would fail, so he had a strange curb. So how did I do? 37/61, or a B-. - I find out about Anthropology on Monday. I felt pretty confident about that. I'm expecting 80% or better. ---------------------------------------------------------------------
I got an e-mail from a reader about the erroneous grammar and spelling in my last entry about Kaiser. I know- I re-read it and realized how bad it was. I never proofread or go back for spelling errors unless my Mac catches it. I write so much and sometimes my posts take a while to write. For me the posts are a documentation of my life, so I want to have a record more than anything; but I know and apologize for it being hard to read.
