Monday, November 16, 2009

Got a lot of answers

Max instant messaged me last night about 6p.m. He asked what I was doing, what he was doing, and once we had established neither of us were busy, we wanted to go out. I suggested food. He was agreeable to that. Drinks and music suddenly came up, and the next thing you know we were going to karaoke at the gay bar in the city.

I drive over to his place in the next city over and find out he lives with a guy he works for doing handyman and landscaping type jobs. That explains his living situation. We drove to the bar and chatted about what we did the day, work, and sang country songs. He asked what I would sing at the bar and I joked Rascal Flatts. He said he'd do Toby Keith. He asked why I didn't have country music on. He put it on and then we broke out into singing Toby Keith's "It's A Little Too Late" as it came on the radio. We talked in the club how there would be no jealousy/we would be comfortable socializing, meeting people, making out, whatever happens, and that we will still be friends. A little disclaimer for a wild night.

We get to the bar and he knows a group of regulars as we come in. I had seen the older blond headed guy and his husband several times as they are regulars. They are having a beer bust and were serving tacos, so we helped ourselves to some, as well as a glass of Amberbush. We go outside and sit down at a table with 2 guys who were together and going through a difficult time. He convinced one of them to sing "Ain't Going Down Til The Son Comes Up" by Garth Brooks and Max sang "The Thunder Rolls" by Garth Brooks. He did a pretty good job. He has a great voice. He also sang a song from a musical, what song I'm not sure. Then the last song he sang was "Mud on the Tires" by Brad Paisley. WOW.

Max makes his rounds from the different groups he knows and I deduce there are at least 5-6 guys names who keep coming up that he has been with or knows. I meet the regulars again and we chat. I introduce myself. One of the guys is a hairstylist and asked where I went to school. He names several of his clients, all of whom I knew. It was interesting. I meet several others, a couple teachers, and stuff like that. We chatted about what we teach, stuff like that. Max continues going around being social and I kind of hang with regulars, which turned out to a lot of "Bump"ing and "Grind"ing. 6 of the guys in the group were the 6 guys you always see on Grindr, the iPhone app that tracks gay guys and their proximity to you. Well, let's just say I know for a fact 3 of them I had no interest in to begin with, and to see them in person was kind of nice. I downloaded the app Bump while we were there so that we could exchange numbers and info. That was little unnerving I was giving away my number so freely. I really don't think it is a big issue. A few more drinks, more chatting, lots of random convos. Convos about clothes, hair, and the hair stylist gave me some ideas about sideburns for my hair, which I'm not fond of mine. Lots of ass grabbing. Lots of random stuff, one of the bigger bear type guys was lifting all of us up, talking about how light we were, how you can pop someone's back so easily and stuff. I was lifted up probably a half dozen times. Lots of flirting with the entire group.

The patio closed and we made our way inside where the dance music was playing. The hairstylist is flirting with me, although he is married. He chats about my big feet, how cute and young I am, stuff like that. Soon we are all comparing foot sizes, some guy Doug is showing me his dick on his iPhone. Then we are discussing wardrobe. The hairstylist comes in and sneaks a few kisses from me, which was just shocking. I was not expecting that. He'd lean in and plant them on my lips. Then I'm dancing with him, one of the latino guys in the group, and the 3 of us are grinding on each other. Max was just kind of standing around watching, and that felt awkward because it was a "date." I ended up going out on the dance floor with Max, the hairstylist, and latino guy.

We hung around the bar until 11:15 when everyone started to leave. The hairstylist made me promise I'd text him today. Driving home I apologized for grabbing his dick- he was offended- but I was put on by the group to, and the group was out targeting him throughout the night to do that. He told me about how the guys we met were all good guys. He told me about his sisters and how they are always more successful than him. We talk about sarcasm. He told me he wanted to just be friends as we talked about how we both got that from the night. He keeps asking me what I know about him. He kept asking if The Guy was only a friend. I replied over and over that he was. I went to him for advice, and shared the example of my professor and the sexuality paper. I told him again for the 1000 time how The Guy asked if I thought he was hot, then told him to message me. I sort of pried asking what his beef was. We chat more and he tells me he doesn't like The Guy. The Guy really hurt him and pissed him off by walking on out sex when they first met and it damaged him so much where he lost 30 pounds. He didn't like The Guy's attitude and stuff like that. He asked what I thought of that, and I admitted I was shocked and bothered. He told me how he still hasn't had sex since then since he feels so insecure. I just told him I was sorry. We hugged and called it a night.

So here I am at home and I realize just being friends is fine. I don't want to be in a relationship because it may turn out one of those things where I say one thing to one person, do one thing with another, and that's not cool. I think both are good guys. I think Max is still figuring himself out, and I'm supportive of that, but I think that he is still in his "slutty" stage, as The Guy would term it, and that's ok, but I don't think he's really looking for a boyfriend.

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