Still can't stand her

Spent the afternoon with my parents... and sister... focusing on my sister because I'm here at their house and she is driving me hella crazy.

- Parents needed to leave the house by 1 - my dad goes in to tell my sister and she barks at him that he should friggin' know she was doing her hair
- In the car my sister wanted "to go play with planes." Are we 5?
- My sister talks like an old woman... this pothole wasn't here last week
- She kept talking about different happenings like it was 100 years ago
- My sister tutors her students in math... where does she find the time in three 50 minute classes per week?
- My sister loves her students. She brought them cider so they could have a party, as well as baked cookies, brought chips, cookies, and more.
- My sister has convinced so many students to take statistics because she is such a great tutor
- My sister was putting down my dad because he said he hated Algebra. She said that statistics and Algebra are the easiest subjects. I remember many nights she spent crying taking Algebra because she didn't get it, or know what was going on. I remember her going to tutoring for that for hours on end just to make sure she would pass the class.
- My sister was telling how easy calculus was... she never took calculus. In high school she went as far as Algebra II, then in college she went up to College Algebra and took several statistics classes.
- I called my sister out on this and she said that I didn't know, I hadn't been there with her, I don't pay attention to her, and I have no right challenging her

Winding Down

This month has been tough - I have been super busy at work. I will be the first to admit I work in the ghetto, and I don't use that term lightly because of the stuff I see and hear on a daily basis. There was a guy pushing a cart of scrap metal down the street the other day going with traffic if that gives you an example.

Though I work at an alternative school I have to say the group of kids I have right now are among the smartest/highest performing I have ever taught. I am sad that when we come back in January I won't have them anymore. They all have been so sweet, so willing to learn. They have actually challenged me. We were reading a random poem that was related to our unit a few weeks back, and my goal with using it was simply for comprehension. These kids brought up the diction... who uses those words?!... then the rhyme scheme. I had to take a step back when they mentioned this and quickly think on my feet to handle this.

Our Christmas tree is up. Presents need to be wrapped.

I have had almost no motivation to work on my admin credential this month - I will on Friday - that's my goal. I already had a mess up as I was supposed to go to a meeting on Friday regarding this. Now it will be at least February before I finish the credential since I missed the December meeting. I really didn't mean to. I had known about the meeting for a month. I had it on my calendar - I just switched from Mac to Google Calendars, so I'm thinking the event didn't transfer over. Oh well, I admit that I missed it, and take responsibility. It happens.

I plan to get my name out there once I finish my credential and try to teach a few college classes. I need something to keep me busy now.

I got an award at work the other day, which was pretty cool/surprising. A few people there appreciate me.

Haven't really seen my parents/been to dinner with them in months since I have taken on so many admin duties. I have been meeting my dad for breakfast weekly. I saw my mom last at the Christmas party I blogged about a few weeks back, Thanksgiving, and then maybe around Halloween.

I did go to lunch with my parents/sister on Veterans Day. I remember that. I remember the conversations my ssister had...
- My sister has a photographic memory, which is why she is able to tell me all the streets she takes to get to work... I thought repetition, and simply driving the same way each day would do that for you.
- Aristotle is sexy and her BFF.
- There's no way I'm a good teacher because I use too many red herrings. It is funny she brought that up because my roommate (the other teacher I share a room with) was just teaching about those the day before.
- I rpobably haven't read anything intelligent ever because I can't hold intellectual conversations like she can. Well sis, I don't always engage in conversations like you do where I have to be the know it all.
- I don't read quality literature and science fiction, so I don't have any creativity.

She is a piece of work. She should be a Nobel PRize winner by now or something.

Looking forward to Christmas. It is going to be a new experience since I will be with my partner's family. I am looking forward to a new experience. This will be our first CHristmas we have actually spent together. Usually I arrive the day before or after Christmas to be with him.

A little disappointed we won't make it to NYC this year. It has been a year!!! :(

NYC Christmas Trees

As our man Dan is headed to the NYC for some holiday spirit I'm posting a link from one of my favorite websites. One day I might own an apartment in NYC.

http://www.brickunderground.com/blog/2015/12/going_inside_the_world_of_new_yorks_christmas_tree_guys

Where I come from

GREAT weekend

FRiday night was some Montgomery Gentry

2nd time seeing them in concert, and both of them get finer with age

Saturday was a CHristmas party with the teachers I used to work with in my old district/my mom's friends. Great time catching up. My mom sees them all monthly at an early dinner they all have, but working the schedule I have, it is impossible to get off to see them. Everyone was excited to see me. Networked with a few and got a job offer to go to a district about 30 miles away near The GUy's house. It is an interesting offer, but would mean a greater drive, probably not as good benefits. I am going to check the school out on THursday.

SUnday I relaxed.

LA Morning News has become unwatchable

KABC 7

I never knew how much Garth's impact made an impact on how watchable the morning news was. Bri Winkler has the personality of a wet sponge with no personality - "oh that's lovely, that's beautiful." Did you see how bad she was during the Spark of Love Toy Drive? Alysha DelValle carries the show now. Kristen Aldridge is still unwatchable and doesn't have any chemistry with the rest of the staff.





KTLA
I can watch KTLA between 4 and 7, but Ginger Chan always seems so distant and doesn't have much chemistry with the rest of the talent. I love Henry and don't mind Megan Henderson.

KTLA is more watchable now that Jessica Holmes is on maternity leave. I hope she decides to not come back. No joke.




She needs to do something with her hair. She needs to get a more mature look. She needs to get a personality.

If Lynette Romero were on, it would be much more watchable.
EEEW... as I was writing this I flipped to KTLA and saw Blond Dumb was on. I'm flipping to CBS This Morning.

KNBC

I despise Whit Johnson - he doesn't seem to know alot. He just seems like a pretty boy who we are supposed to think is cute. Daniela Guzman is always absent it seems and Michelle Valles if filling in. Alexis DelChiaro doesn't resonate with me, she is just dumb. She just talks about mindless stuff. Look at her demo reel. And who is this weather girl Shanna? She is on a lot, as
are a lot of other strange looking people KNBC is finding.

The news writing is not bad, and I like the whole "while you were sleeping" thing






KCBS

I can stand Rick and Sharon. I like Stephanie Simmons. Rick and Sharon have been around in LA for a long time. Sharon has been here since the mid 90s, and we expect her to not be the smartest, but she has an LA look to her.


Evelyn Taft is relatively smart, and may be good looking, and I can take it.
I just wish they had more reporters on KCBS in the morning for more live and local coverage.

Stephanie seems smart and owns it.


KTTV

I can't stand the 7-9 bimbos - Araksya Karapeteyan and Lisa Breckenridge and Maria Sansone. Their format where they give opinions on the story is terrible considering these ladies know nothing.

Maria Sansone just creeps me out. Those eyes.

And why is Rick Dickert back in studio in the mornings? I like him in the helicopter. He carries the show and makes KTTV watchable between 4:30 and 7. He's got looks and personality, and is a SHARP dresser. This morning he had on black pants, a shirt and tie, and sweater. He looked quite dapper.

Gift giving

The older I get the more joy I get from giving rather than receiving a gift. I have been thinking about that a lot this holiday season as I am shopping for gifts for family and people on my gift list.

I am all about the perfect gift, and feel I am well on my way to that for many people. As I get older I have a little more to spend on gifts, but its not about that. To me its about finding what will bring people the most happiness, fulfill a need, or a surprise they weren't expecting. The gifts for my partner, parents, and even my sister I believe fulfill those requisites.

And the joy when they receive the gifts, that's the best part of all.

Bringing you and me up to date

What's been going down?

Work:
- Craziness - lots of extra hours (thankfully I'm getting paid)
- Lots of issues with the community at hand and the issues are coming onto our campus
- Getting good admin practice

School:
- FINALLY - A MONTH LONG BREAK, then class resumes again in January
- Going to use this month to get all my fieldwork done

Travel/Life:
- Something every weekend until the first weekend of the year... yay!!! Travel!!!

Black Friday:
- Nothing is catching my eye... yet.
- I will probably be at the hospital with my cousin visiting her newborn baby.

My partner:
- He's great, he's working a little and I'm working a lot
- He has dinner ready for me when I get home, and I couldn't be more thankful

Conferences:
- Getting my name out there. At a conference right now in a boring session. I am sitting at the back typing this. Learning tons of cool new things to try in my classroom - unfortunately all of these will take time.
- Was asked to present at a state conference soon, which is another good way to get my name out there

Tunes you need to know

Tune Thursday


This has been stuck in my head all day - not a Sam fan.


I feel like I could almost follow Drake's moves.


What a sexy voice


After hearing this song for months it is growing on me.



And while I'm on a music tangent...
- What happened to Easton Corbin lately? He's recording all these crappy songs that aren't showing his true vocal abilities.

And I need to rant about Carrie Underwood's Smoke Break. Of course she needs a smoke break, but she doesn't smoke, and she's a good Christian, covered her bases for a typical Carrie Underwood song. Terrible.

I've got to go. Elex just came on TV and I cannot take it.

Thai Massage

Has anyone ever had one? I want to try. I hear it hurts like hell the day after, but I'm curious. Is it better/more relaxing than deep tissue?

The girl who had been my regular deep tissue massage girl just ain't cutting it. She hasn't been getting out knots that I've told her about, and she acknowledges are there, because she wants to be sure to get my entire body. Give me a good massage and target the areas/troubleshoot completely where I'm having issues please.

Keeping up events

Usually I am the friend in contact with everyone - always messaging asking what's up. I did it all through undergrad, graduate, and now my 2nd graduate credential I seem to be slacking.

I am fine with that. My partner is now our social coordinator - not that he wasn't before - I just went with the flow, but he knows the what and is making the plans with all our friends. I'm the person suddenly that takes hours to respond to a text. It is kind of interesting. I appreciate the random texts/hellos I get from friends who notice I am incommunicado.

We've got some good times coming up -
- Last weekend we were in the desert visiting some friends of my partner's
- This past weekend we were in LA and spent the night there for a flight my partner had this morning. Had a nice brunch yesterday.
- We've got something planned nearly every weekend for the forseeable future.

Honestly I am loving the travel, it is just what I need to keep me sane. It provides an escape.

Long days

I am busier than ever right now when it comes to work. I think that's obvious with the topics of my recent posts.

I am pulling anywhere between 7 and 12 hour days at work. I am the testing coordinator now, intervention teacher, and acting principal in the evenings, in addition to just teaching my classes. No, I'm not getting any extra pay for it. A lot of it "falls under" what I have to do for my admin credential fieldwork, so it is just volunteer so to speak, or voluntold.

I come home and am working on my school work for my credential. Discussion board posts are the bane of my existence since I am not a procrastinator. I get my shit done weeks in advance and have to wait until usually Saturday night when the rest of the class gets around to posting their posts, which are due by midnight Saturday.

I still make time to make it to the gym in the morning. I'm down to 161 pounds, from 170, which is awesome.

My weekends have mostly been taken up with visiting friends.

Its funny, this is the most I have worked in a long time, and the busiest I've been. Usually it is my partner who is traveling, working a lot. The tides have changed, and now it is me. It feels weird. It feels weird, especially when I am not making big bucks for my work. It is ok because this is only temporary. I just know I don't want this to continue too long. Being an admin I don't think is for me.

When I get where I'm going

I made this comment on the Closet Professor's blog the other day, and it is something I am still thinking about

Your post struck a lot of chords with me - doing what was expected as opposed to your passion - I feel like I am there right now. I am at a mostly amazing school in a plush position that gives me great freedom to do what I want as long as it is in the best interest of the students. I am in the admin credential program because everyone told me to do it - all of my friends, parents, and teachers I know. I don't have aspirations to be an administrator, though I know I could be a good one. Maybe one day, but not now. I know, and keep having opportunities come to me to move into administration. Its not where I want to be right now. I could. It would be a great pay raise. My partner keeps hearing the money aspect, the great opportunities, and possibility to move into district office where jobs seem even more plush. I have stood my ground that I am right where I need to be now. I've taught for a little over 5 years now, and I want to be here for at least another 5. I believe that if I were to move into admin that 10 years of teaching experience wil give me more credibility as an administrator. I also am looking at positions outside of the teaching/admin realm that require the admin credential/teaching experience, but again, not right now. Your words helped validate what I am feeling now.

The thing is I have had 4 opportunities this year to advance. I turned them all down, though people kept encouraging me to apply saying I have all the skills. I sometimes worry that I am making the wrong decision and if I'm not "taking advantage" so to speak of these opportunities now, will I have the chance later? I'm sure I will. There's only going to be an administrator shortage, much like a teacher shortage, as time goes on with many baby boomers retiring. 

Huntington Beach HS Bully

http://ktla.com/2015/09/24/huntington-beach-high-student-arrested-for-allegedly-beating-visually-impaired-teen-video-of-incident-goes-viral/

This fight has made lots of news over the past few days since it is close to home, it involves a student who is nearly defenseless (often happens in fights, but this one is more heartbreaking in my opinion because the student can barely see).

Now, personal opinions, should the student, Cody, who stepped in be suspended from the football team? No. He was standing up for someone and doing something that we would want all people to do. Cody is awesome in my mind because I don't know the victim, but he is standing up for someone who was defenseless.

What does the law say? First, the school, like many, has a zero tolerance policy. Anyone involved in a fight is to be suspended. I could go into the history of the zero tolerance policy within schools, but let's talk about a few things. In zero tolerance cases this acts in conjunction with ed code, and any student involved is suspended regardless of circumstances.

There are other elements the media is not addressing - Filming fights has changed the nature of them. Under zero tolerance, but also state law,  anyone who films or is standing around as a witness is also supposed to be suspended. I wonder if they are in this case.

So as an administrator I would have to put my biases aside because I think that Cody should not be suspended, but the law is what I have to follow:

Cody, the bully, and the victim, under zero tolerance requires that they be suspended under 48900 A

The bully would be suspended under 48900 R, 48900.4B, which would also mean the bully would be referred to the police and most likely cited.

Ed code is below:

48900.  A pupil shall not be suspended from school or recommended
for expulsion, unless the superintendent of the school district or
the principal of the school in which the pupil is enrolled determines
that the pupil has committed an act as defined pursuant to any of
subdivisions (a) to (r), inclusive:
   (a) (1) Caused, attempted to cause, or threatened to cause
physical injury to another person.
   (2) Willfully used force or violence upon the person of another,
except in self-defense.

 (r) Engaged in an act of bullying. For purposes of this
subdivision, the following terms have the following meanings:
   (1)  "Bullying" means any severe or pervasive physical or verbal
act or conduct, including communications made in writing or by means
of an electronic act, and including one or more acts committed by a
pupil or group of pupils as defined in Section 48900.2, 48900.3, or
48900.4, directed toward one or more pupils that has or can be
reasonably predicted to have the effect of one or more of the
following:
   (A) Placing a reasonable pupil or pupils in fear of harm to that
pupil's or those pupils' person or property.
   (B) Causing a reasonable pupil to experience a substantially
detrimental effect on his or her physical or mental health.
   (C) Causing a reasonable pupil to experience substantial
interference with his or her academic performance.
   (D) Causing a reasonable pupil to experience substantial
interference with his or her ability to participate in or benefit
from the services, activities, or privileges provided by a school.

Sometimes as an administrator things happen that you disagree with, but you have to act based on the laws of district and state, and that's how it would have to be handled. And not following those laws puts you out of a job. Decisions like this anger me.

Some thinkings of me

I have had a crazy ton of songs stuck in my head lately - here are some - not all of them are necessarily quality or favorites, but I keep hearing:





--- LOVE THIS SONG

 --- An amazing song

They were pretty dang good in concert last night ---


- Saw Brandi too, she was very good

Saw No Doubt a few nights ago at the same concert...


Also been super busy with work pulling 8 hour or more days - I've been acting principal, teaching, testing coordinator/tester, on nearly every committee... all because of my admin credential

Had the most amazing weekend wtih my partner. Love him more and more. I was thinking the other day how I truly love and share everything with him, and care so much.

Bought a Chromebook the other day. It is fun, but can't access the portal for my online class. Ended up giving it to my dad in the meantime. I have a feeling one is in his future.

Kristen Aldridge

Another reason I can't watch ABC 7 after Garth Kemp left, their new social media specialist with news and entertainment drives me up the wall.

A few students know

A few students found out I'm gay. One girl obviously has a gaydar. She came in day 1, and gave me hell. She was sweet last year, to me at least, but having her as a student changes things. She basically outs me in front of the class and the kids giggle. She asked, "did your husband or wife cook you dinner last night," as there was an ant invasion near my desk overnight, and my lunch container was on my desk because of that. I informed her I cooked, and I am a damn good cook, and men can be good cooks. The kids laughed because they knew she was targeting my sexuality. I said "most men can't come up with these comebacks, and don't think I don't know what you're trying to do," and she was like "woooooooow," and the kids started laughing. It's only because I've had most of these kids 2 years in a row now. What's funny is my other class thinks I'm completely straight, yet very metrosexual.

This girl is a major problem - hence why she was kicked out of her other schools. She told another teacher she feels she can't act badly in my class because I have a soft voice. I practiced a "deep voice" today, however, with her as the kids were doing seat work. Anyways, she is obnoxious and loud, but in my class she is not. In fact, as she is leaving each day she always has some churchy remark, which is totally amusing. WTF? Do I need to be saved? She said "God Bless" as she left one day, another day was "Jesus loves you," another was "I'm praying Psalm 46:1 for you." I had to look that one up... lol... She's one of those deep down...

“God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble.” Psalm 46:1

I just laugh because she so doesn't have the Jesus freak persona, but for whatever reason, feels she can't act up in my class. GOOD TIMES.

Quick update

Super busy. I've been pulling 10 hour days, as opposed to the usual 7. I'm not complaining. It hasn't been bad. I've got a bunch of new duties now that I'm going toward my admin credential. I am in charge of several new programs at school. I'm getting to play administrator too by serving as admin designee. I also teach sometime in between all of this. I'm on 5 different committees right now. I have yet to feel like I'm spreading myself too thin - soon, I'm sure I will. A couple of these things, 3 of the committees, are required requisites for my admin credential. I haven't been stressed or feel like I have a lot of extra pressure. I know how to work hard and work efficiently. I know how to use my resources, and I am doing all of those right now. I don't have stress, it is just physically exhausting.

SUPER DUPER EXCITED FOR ALL THE TRAVEL COMING UP...

 Labor Day Weekend, last weekend we were in Phoenix. Hung out with my partner's coworker. Metrosexual straight men amuse me. He hugged and kissed both of us before he left when we said goodbye for the night.

This weekend my partner is gone and I'm doing an LA day trip with my parents.

The following weekend is a concert in San Diego, so we will be down there all weekend.

The weekend after that we are staying at the LA County Fair

We haven't traveled this much in months, and I am so excited.

Christmas Break is planned. NY/PR

Spring Break is also planned. México

Summer is in the works.

Morning News

I used to love my morning news, the KTLA Morning News, Good Day LA, and GMA. I loved Michaela Pereira and Frank Buckley, and could stand watching them. Frump then took over the anchor chair when Michaela went to CNN. I can't stand Frump, that's my name for her, Jessica Holmes. She looks so out place most of the time. She doesn't have a real news background. She doesn't have weather certifications like CBM.

This was her past before coming to KTLA:



She cannot get off the set fast enough. I hope she takes a really long maternity leave and Lynette Romero fills in the entire time. I could stand that. I could watch the show for maybe more than 10 minutes to get the top headlines.

I can't watch Good Day LA post Dorothy and Jillian. I just don't like any of the people on there. It seems like bimbo hour.



I find these days I watch KTLA for 10 minutes at the top of the hour to get the news, then head to GMA or CBS. It would be nice if there were a local show to watch, one that had a little less frump, and fewer bimbos.

Garth and Robert are gone

To make a shitty day at work worse, Robert Holguin and Garth Kemp are gone from ABC7. I'm saddened.

I wonder who will replace Garth. The only weather anchor in LA at the present that is as interesting/exciting is Rick Dickert. Maybe someone outside?

Jonathan Novack might be ok. I cannot stand, and would totally stop watching in the morning if Bri Winkler took over for Garth. Cannot stand her.

My 10 Year Reunion

My 10Yr HS reunion was this past Saturday.

At first I was hesitant to go - everyone I wanted to see was not attending. It was organized solely via facebook, and all but about 80 kids in my class of 578 were on the facebook group. People kept posting they couldn't come, and even people that were random acquaintances/friends who it would have been nice to see.

I decided to go anyway. I knew the turnout would be low. There were like 50 of us, which seemed pretty good in the facebook age.

When I got there I was able to blend in with Jenn and her friends. We talked a few minutes and then I was forced to go interact with one of the Mike's. He was friendly. We semi hugged, then talked about work. I shared what I was up to, as did he. We talked about our families. We were civil toward each other and continued to be cordial each time we interacted through the night. We are not friends, but we are facebook friends again... lol. I think we both have grown up and menial things don't matter.

Walked around and chatted groups of people I never even interacted with - Britt. N and her friend. A few more like my neighbor, Lindsay and her friend Carrie. Also talked to Addisson a lot - he has changed - lost tons of weight and looked good.

There was dinner and cheap drinks. No one got trashed. There was beer pong, but the cups were filled with water. The 2 girls that put it on did a great job.

Met up with the lesbian and her friends. The lesbian is a girl who was obviously lesbian and wore a suit to prom. She was always very sweet to me, but we connected even more this weekend. We went to the after party at a nearby bar, and my partner came along. She and him were getting along great. My partner didn't want to go with me because we probably didn't have to much to say given we have only been out of school 10 years, he decided most of my high school friends were white trash, and he never went to his reunion, so didn't want to go to mine.

Some random observations - based on the cars in the parking lot I had one of the nicest there. Everyone smokes... Will, Addisson, Spencer, Lindsay, and lots more. Maybe its just social... who knows. Outside of Will I am one of the more successful people there. He is probably making upward of 6 figures doing engineering for a major SoCal company. I have much more credentials than the teacher friends I have around here, and have a more established career. Its crazy how even people we didn't interact with we can still be civil with. What a difference 10 years makes...

Back to work, back to school Monday

Its back to work for me tomorrow. First day with students. The past couple days were training days.

I am not really worried. I am worried in that I wonder who I will have in my classes. I'm worried I will have bad kids. I am sure by Wednesday I will be fine, but right now, I have nerves.

I'm teaching 2 new classes- 1 doesn't worry me as its a tutoring class, and the other is Espanol. I'm worried that I'm teaching Spanish to those who already know, and know more than me, know more slang, etc. I'm worried about that battle. I have the first 3 weeks of my class tentatively planned.

This song has been stuck in my head all weekend. ALL WEEKEND. Love it, though.



Cole is great in person too ;)

Spent the last few days of summer break going to LA and doing a train trip. It was such a blast.

Also went up to Big Bear and did some wine tasting.

Wreckingball

It seems to be the buzzword in songs right now...

All I am saying is Miley started it...


Then Eric Church did something with it...


Blake Shelton - Sangria


Like Dear Blake, "wreckingball, dancing down the hall," what does wreckingball have to do with getting ready to get it on?

Rachel Platten - Fight Song


And you are a fighter, so wreckingball is appropriate I guess?

In my book, only Eric and Miley get cred for their wreckingballs.

And this is beyond sexy on an unrelated note.
http://www.kiisfm.com/onair/letty-b-56397/nick-jonas-wears-actual-chains-at-13782842/

AVON Calling

Remember many moons ago when I used to post about the AVON lady? She died a few weeks back. She was only like 68 or so. I was sort of surprised. It is kind of crazy. This woman was always a mess.

What's on my playlist these days

Eric Church has such an amazing nasally voice, yet passionate. And I want to make love like that.




Such an awesome sound, and so different than everything else out there. Plus he is Rhett Akins son!


I love the line "shakin' that money maker..." and has been stuck in my head nonstop

My whereabouts

Been super busy working on my admin credential and a bilingual credential course.

Went to Vegas for about 4 days. Lost $200. All. Boo. Saw Reba, Brooks & Dunn, which was an amazing show.

Went to San Fran, met my partner's best friend, then did a roadtrip down the state stopping in wine country, and Santa Monica.

I am in LA this week for my state committee, and just met up with my wine women, and 2-3 other people I met. We are all partying it up in my room. Seriously, I have a huge room. We all have 2 bottles of wine we brought to help us through what will seriously, during the hours of probably at least 8-5, will be intensive debate and scrutinizing.

My partner and I had a brunch for a bunch of coworkers a few weeks back. Loved it. Always enjoy having them over and entertaining. Too bad MB couldn't come since family came in to town unexpectedly. He is like "I'm straight, but I discovered I really like brunch."

Losing a best friend

Losing The Guy's friendship - if that's what has happened - has left me wondering and feeling empty when it comes to friends.

Some people have many best friends. I have a few, and I try to keep them close. My 4 best friends are my friend the pilot, but I can't talk about things like sexuality with him. Career, yes, family, yes. I can share just about anything with Sissy, but there's 2 things I don't feel comfortable talking with her about - money and my partner - I don't have negative things to say about my partner, but she knows him well too, and likes him, and I feel like I can't say a lot because of that. I know all about her marital problems, and money issues, but it feels weird for me to share with her. Gonzo is another I can share just about anything with, however, I don't feel like she has real advice to give me sometimes, like with teaching, or life experiences because she hasn't been there.

The Guy was someone I could share everything with - about family, friends, work, school, career, life, you name it. I don't have that anymore, and I miss it. We hadn't really seen each other since my schedule switched to mornings. It was always hit and miss, and he didn't seem to be willing to meet up for breakfast, when I suggested. Was our friendship gone then? We had worked for about 4-5 months to get together, then when I said some things, maybe that severed it completely. We did chat a few times, and had good conversations prior to me saying those things. I just still ponder - was it that final thing I said? Was it my persistence? He was the one who always said he appreciated it because otherwise he wouldn't get out and see people. I appreciated his friendship, and always tried to reciprocate.

I just feel like I'm lacking a best friend - some people say their partner is - and I certainly consider my partner my best friend, but it is hard I guess.

Some biz going on in my life

Let's see...

Summer classes for my admin credential are going fine. I'm ahead, so that's good, I am actually able to have a summer.

Still working on the state project. LOTS more to go, but going to work hard to knock a lot out tomorrow and Wednesday.

Friday I was in a fender bender getting off the freeway - I was at the stop, the guy didn't see me until the last moment, and plowed into me. It literally bent the fender of my car. I was driving my partner's luxury SUV. Wasn't my fault. Insurance has been great. I was so worried my partner would be upset, but he's glad since the car has a lot of miles and the headlights on the lift gate should match again... haha.

Spent the weekend shopping.

Last night my mom sent me a terrible text I didn't want to hear. I heard about a month and a half ago that Momma P had been using a breathing tube at night. Friday night she had a heart attack, and died Saturday afternoon about 4pm. I was stunned. I wanted to cry, and it was everything to hold back tears. This woman's legacy is incredible. She always wanted her hug, and I can still hear her raspy voice saying "gimme a hug." She was always so cheery. She always asked my mom how I was. I can't believe she is gone. She was the heart of all of the staff get togethers. My mom still meets them monthly, but I look forward to the updates. Momma knew everything about everyone. I'm saddened even further I probably won't be able to make the funeral since I have had vacation plans for 6, and can't cancel, otherwise I'm not going to be able to meet up with my partner and his friend. I think the last time I saw Momma was about a year and a half ago - maybe when my mom had a get together at the buffet with all the staff. I feel like I've seen her more recently, but now it is escaping me. That's one part of my schedule at work that bites. I can't go to the getogethers. It is going to feel strange not hearing about her, and knowing she truly is gone.

Last night I also sold my car. The first car I bought independent of my parents. The guy who bought it was about 22. He gave me about $800 more than I could get trading it in. Woo.

Gonzo and I got together today. I haven't seen her in probably a year. I saw her when she was student teaching. She and my dad went to IHOP. I had resources to give her since she will be a first year teacher this coming year. I got to meet her daughter who was only 3-4 months old at the time. So happy for Gonzo, and so excited that she finally got her teaching job!!!

Avoiding my family

I call my parents each day as I am leaving work. I called them Tuesday night and was annoyed. My mom was complaining about this or that, and whether or not we could get together this week. I called her Wed night because it was her birthday, but only spoke for about 2 minutes, then I cut the call short because I was annoyed, and was getting into the car.

I got a text from my dad while at work Thursday saying they wanted to meet me in the city I work, and asked what restaurants were around. I mentioned all restaurants but TGI Fridays. I hate Fridays. My parents love it. I asked if we had to go there, and if we could go to Chilis. My mom doesn't like Chilis, and my dad said "NO." There's a BJ's in the city I work, and one a few cities away. Suddenly they asked if I wanted to go to the BJ's a few cities away. When you were just telling me about coming over to near where I work why are we going that far out? NO. My dad texted asking if the time could be made later. I said I have to be home by 7:30, and that was that.

It feels weird that I didn't call them Friday, but you annoyed me, and I'm still annoyed.

Ouch ouch fuck fuck

Yesterday at work I played in the students vs. staff softball game. And we have the worst student pitchers. The balls are thrown all over. And they have been playing softball for several weeks!

I can tell you the last time I held a bat - last year during the softball game on the last day of school. I hit pretty well last year despite sucky pitches. I think part of it was that this kid pitching today couldn't pitch to lefties. All of us lefties were getting horrible pitches.

So we were playing. I struck out my first at bat, and was swinging at random shit. In the 8th I made my final at bat, and at bat, I hit a ball that made it to about 2nd base. When I hit I don't know if I was in surprise, but I took off running, or maybe hadn't yet. I made a small jump, came down on my knee, am starting to tremble, and feel my right leg extend to the right as I'm coming down. I'm losing my balance, but manage to keep my grace and stay on my feet, and make it to first base. I made it. WHEW. SAFE. It must be a muscle spasm or something, but it hurts like hell. It is my side calf and front calf that hurts. I knew this would hurt for days. I am hoping it is just a spasm. It is not a sprain. It doesn't feel like the bone. But OH... it hurts. I am walking around like the senior history teacher, with a limp. I already have a terrible left knee, so this isn't welcoming news. I'm optimistic it is only temporary.

All I could think about after the injury was ouch ouch fuck fuck.

I massaged it - whether or not I should have - it felt better. I also iced it most of last night. I had my leg up on the couch all night. Now I'm going to go into work stumbling around like a fool today.

Came out to a tough crowd

I was invited out with some coworkers, which felt nice, especially at a school where I don't like and get along with many. There are a few cool people.

Big Science Teacher invited us out after graduation last night to a bar. It was about 8 guys from work, and 2 girls. About 8 of the people I like, and the rest, I'm not fans. So we were all at several tables put together, and I was about 3 Jacks in, and I felt the confidence to talk to Jullee, the new science teacher, who is sadly not able to return next year. I told her I had a partner when we were talking about things around where she lives becuase my partner and I like to go down to her city to hang out with J&B.

The night progressed and I came out to our AM math teacher. She taught PM last year. She wanted to see photos and pics. We were talking about what we like to do for fun, and I said travel, eat out, and she asked if I like to dance. I said yes, but my partner doesn't. She said "ohhh... aww... let's see him."

I'm sure the judgmental math teacher across from us, and maybe 1-2 more heard, but oh well. I am sure a few of them may speak negatively about it, but oh well.

And today in my 4th period as we are leaving for summer break a student, Mac, asked if he could ask me a personal question - he was1 of 2 kids in the room. When he said that I knew what was coming - I said he could. He said, "Mr. Teacher, are you married or gay?" I said I was gay, but partnered. He said that clears up a lot of questions. I can be whatever, he has heard I am gay, he has heard I am straight, so he didn't know. I am at the point where if kids ask I will tell them as long as it is not intimidating and I don't fear they will be chismosos or give me a hard time for it. And that was fucking hard to admit. That sounds like something Mac would say. LOL.

The Guy unfriended me on facebook

I don't know what to say.

I was just thinking I hadn't seen posts from him for a while, so went to his page, and it said "add friend."

Wow.

My partner was deleted too. I'm still friends with The Guy's partner on facebook...

Keith Urban's songs all sound the same

Anyone hear that same guitar melody throughout these 2? This urks me beyond belief. Be creative, damn it.

Expanding my horizons

Thanks to my awesome partner, he has expanded my horizons, and we are discussing a Christmas Euro vacation. It saddens me I may not be with fmaily, but the thought of spending Christmas in a cute little German or French village sounds amazing and quaint.

I also would love to be en Espana durante that time.



I listen to this song about a dozen times a year - even when it is not Christmas. I'm on round 3 of it so far tonight.

Spanish Harlem

It wasn't until I heard Frankie Valli sing it that I appreciated and began to love the song.

And it wasn't until I heard Frankie Valli sing it that I knew "Spanish Harlem" was a place... and I want to visit it... I have only been up in Harlem once, and it was by accident. I also want to visit up by Columbia... haha

RIP Ben E. King

Did you know Spanish Harlem was written by Phil Spector?






Oh, and speaking of Frankie Valli, I bawled in Jersey Boys, the movie, when his daughter died. I was on the plane headed to NYC.

Oh, and on another tangent I would be the person going through Spanish Harlem playing this song as I did. And when I go to NY the ubiquitous song I have to play on my iPhone before I arrive is "Empire State of Mind"E



And anytime I am leaving on a jetplane I have to play this song.

Down 7

I've been doing cardio 3-4 times a week at the gym. Guess it is paying off. I'm down 7 pounds. From 171, which was my absolute highest weight ever, to 164. I vowed I will not let 171 show ever again. Down to 164 and dropping.

BDay Weekend

Spent the weekend in San Clemente for my partner's birthday. Asked him what he wanted to do and where he wanted to go. San Clemente was where he decided. We lvoe going there for a weekend getaway. Small town, fun shops, good restaurants. Lots of margaritas and wine. Lots of flirting. Went down to Oceanside after and then headed home. Great weekend.

Birthday Card

Sent The Guy a birthday card and have yet to hear from him. And I don't expect to.

I have posted a couple of comments to things he posted on facebook and don't get a reply when other people do. Oh well. I tried.

On the cusp of something good

I've blogged about my coworkers several times before. I have to say I put in so much less work than at my previous school, but I know I am still effective. I have implemented the new standards effortlessly, have been sent to several trainings, have been asked to take new leadership roles on campus (one of the lead testing teachers for the new state testing, lead staff development, and more). I was just elected to that state committee. Now I am receiving a district honor in a few days. I recently also just applied for a technology grant and am receiving thousands of dollars for my classroom to go completely paperless. I am starting my admin credential - not because I want to be a principal, I have no want. I want to just have it to use for maybe something related to curriculum. But in the meantime I have no want - I like where I'm at - I don't work real hard, but I work efficiently, and am rewarded. I like that I have the respect of students and admin. But I feel something amazing, some incredible opportunity may be around the corner for me with all the successes I've had this year at this school. Its hard to describe this feeling - like when you know you're onto something, and you feel good, that's how I feel. Like when you know you are about to rewarded for your success...

Adnauseum post about cars

You guys know I keep talking about buying a car... or wanting a car... its a dead horse with me

I have a former coworker who wants to buy my car - he will give me KBB or greater for it. I could get about $5,500-6,500 for my car. It is a 2008 with 103,000 miles.

I like my car - I get about 30mpg, its a compact, it has bluetooth, no-key ignition, and more. It has a few problems - some paint is chipping and missing from an unfortunate tire incident.

But sometimes I see car deals and am tempted.

I like the idea of a lot of leases right now - $129 a month, $900 down for 24 or 36 months, $169 a month and $0 drive off. Lots of deals. I dislike the idea of not owning something, a little higher insurance because of a lease, and the chance of any damage that may occur that I may have to pay for.

My partner is encouraging me to sell my car if I can get that much for it. He has 3 cars, and says I can drive any 1 of those. My everyday car would become an older model SUV. I like the idea - I would save money - unless gas prices go up anymore ($3.00 costs $50.00 to fill the SUV up). The thing is my car is my freedom, and I have a hard time giving that up, though there is no reason not to...

I'm unsure if I want to lease or buy. I know if I want to buy I want to wait...

Mad week

This has been a mad week.

I am on a state committee, and we spent the entire week learning our job over the next few months. It has been an absolutely insane week of training, and often the training was as clear as mud. The work is going to be daunting when it starts next week and will require 100s of hours of my free time to complete. I can't say much more. We were basically sworn to secrecy.

The one thing that has kept me sane are the Wine Women as I call them, a bunch of women in my group, from the OC, who all know each other. They are hilarious. All hispanic women, or women that speak Spanish. They are so cute. One of them, O, has talked about her need for "vino" nonstop. After day 1 we went to the bar, did our homework, drank 3 glasses of wine, and enjoyed $13 wine. We talked about work, what they do, and it was a blast.

We met the next day and had a great bond.

Last night I suggested we go to a wine bar I like. We met at the pool first for margaritas and tequila shots, then we headed out via uber. Amazing food and amazing wine. We had a blast. Talked about anything and everything, especially travel. Told them about my partner, and my godmoms as they have called themselves were ready to plan my wedding They all had a piece they wanted to do, and all I had to do was call my partner and propose. SUCH FUN. Oh, and the uber car was all decked out in lights. It was a blast. We had so much fun. Laughing and joking. Hugging and taking selfies.

I can't wait until we come back together to drink. I'm bringing bottles of wine next time and we will have a party in my room. Tequila will probably be necessary too.

Local/national/world news

I remember the good old days of watching KCAL Prime 9 News with Pat Harvey and David Jackson.

David Jackson would be in the field reporting from somewhere in California.

I remember later Kerry Kilbride and Jane Velez Mitchell. Jerry Dunphy was at 9pm.

The first hour, 8pm, they would focus on stories specifically about California, local news/issues, what was going around the state. 9pm would focus on nationwide news, and 10pm was world news if I recall correctly.

Why don't stations do that at 4, 5, and 6pm? There's some days I watch the news and it is so repetitive. Definitely cover the most important stories at the top of each hour that have a local impact, then tell us what is going on around the nation and world. I am sure it has to do with limited resources, but there's sources news stations can turn to (AP, affiliates, etc.) for content.

Propping up the little man

I have some insane coworkers - I have had several I've been unable to connect with. There are a few that I have somewhat of a friendship with.

Big Science Teacher is one of those - I guess that's' what I will call him from here on out - he is the biggest pessimist. Bitches and complains about everything, and everyone. He is super critical, and is a huge Angel's fanatic. His heart is in the right place. He cares for the kids, he cares about society, and he complains when any interest other than that comes into play.

It has taken me a year to become friends with him.

Today we had a bonding moment. We talked about our students, our problems, why we have a hard time.

He made a comment about how he is suddenly being invited to all these conferences and is in good graces with admin.

I didn't tell him, but part of that is me.

I am still perplexed. I've been at this school a year, as of tomorrow, and I still don't fit in. I don't bash anyone. I simply recognize those who do a good job and care. It perplexes me that I am suddenly being approached by the principal for my opinions on staff who should attend conferences, those who are tech savvy, and those who care. And what Big Sci doesn't know is I'm his biggest advocate behind the scenes. He knows tech, he cares about the kids, and he is anal about the kids being prepped for everything, like me.

But its people like this who often don't get the recognition they deserve.

And he is one of a handful of coworkers I can stand.

Can't sleep

My partner travels about 50% of the time. I'd say about 50% of the time I don't get a great night's sleep. I've gotten over the sleep issues from my past - taking hours to fall asleep - Melatonin solved that.

What has me wide awake is my surroundings - we have a sliding glass door in the bedroom - what if someone breaks in? Mind you, it has a stopper to prevent it from opening more than a foot. What if the dog doesn't bark and there is an intruder? What if there are burglars? What if I don't hear any of this?

These are the things I'm up against when I'm trying to get some sleep.

Tonight I'm 1,500 miles away from my partner - in a hotel room of my own - and I'm sure it'll be like last night when I was at home. I couldn't sleep. I was worried about everything that could happen. I miss the security when he is around. I miss laying next to him.

More Hawaii

Because I spent a week there.

Kiluea volcano steamflow

Black sand beach. Coolest thing. All of the volcanic rock decomposing to create this.

Part of the 80s lava flow

Lava flow from December descending on the town Pahoa. One of the other trip highlights. Amazing to see the destruction up close. We were here the day after this article was published. We saw the house that was caught in that lava flow. All the signs throughout town talked of how they plan to stay.

Hawaii Photos

Because I'm late.

Maui

Hibatchi grill on the ship - best hibatchi grill I've been to, and that's a lot coming from a Cali boy. Hibatchi grills are all over.

Northside of the big Island, near Princeville

36th floor view of Waikiki from our room

Champagne bar, where we had a date with Pam and our Aussies each night.

Kiluea Lava Tube

Shin Splints

My sister texted me about a week back she was in the hospital, the power was out, and she was in pain. She said she had shin splints. She runs 15-20 miles a day she said. Really? And you're rather plump? 6 months ago you had such bad allergies and immune system problems you couldn't run, lift weights, or spend time out in the sun. So when did all this change so suddenly that you're practically a marathoner and can run miles at a time?

Shin splints, you're on crutches, fine, but 15-20 miles a day? My ass.

Your inner person

Ever have a friend say your inner black person or inner Mexican is coming out?

When I'm mad, my inner black woman, Shaquana comes out. When I'm around my sissy (former coworker), my inner black person comes out, and I'm La'Fred, her gay BFF.

Most of the time my inner Mexican comes out, and I'm drinking my margaritas, cervezas, eating and cooking my Mexican food. I'm your esexy Pablo or whatever Spanish name comes to mind. I speak some good Spanish and can hispanicize what I say. I can bring on that sexy "e" before "s," as in I would like "un eSprite." And you can't forget that sexy latino color.

I swear I was Mexican in a past life.

Y'all

I like to use the word y'all. It works well with my southern drawl, drives my sister crazy, and forces her to call me Paula Deen.

Sometimes it makes me loathe that I sound so Southern in Southern California...

Toes in the water ass in the sand

Tomorrow I will. In Hawaii on a cruise around Hawaii on NCL.

Cruise is ok. Cruise workers here are a mix of like McDonald's equivalent workers in the US and Applebees bartenders I would say. It has its mix of white trash workers, too. The unique thing about this ship is the majority of the workers are Americans, a rarity in the cruise business. The cruise has been ok - hard to meet people on NCL with freestyle dining. Also, none of the service has been over the top, which my partner equates to having all of these Americans. Same with the service at the resorts - too many Americans - not that great of service.

We are trying to get used to this laid back pace in Hawaii. Seriously, 3 minutes or 4 to go a mile? WTF? It should be a minute a mile. And people drive so slowly. And they drive some real buckets here. We did Road to Hana, which I don't recommend, and seriously, there were random cars like at the side of the road that were all beat up. We ran into an old Isuzu Trooper in the WalMart parking lot on bricks, hood missing, and windows shot out. There's some nice cars. We got a sexy Cadillac to rent and drive.

Currently we are in Maui, and that hasn't impressed us much. Slow pace. Nothing that has just been so pretty or so amazing.

I got my toes in the water, ass in the sand
Not a worry in the world, a cold beer in my hand
Life is good today Life is good today
Well, the plane touched down just about three o'clock
And the city's still on my mind
Bikinis and palm trees danced in my head
I was still in the baggage line
Concrete and cars are there own prison bars like this life I'm living in
But the plane brought me farther
I'm surrounded by water
And I'm not going back again
I got my toes in the water, ass in the sand
Not a worry in the world, a cold beer in my hand
Life is good today Life is good today
Adiós and vaya con Dios
Yeah I'm leaving GA
And if it weren't for tequila and pretty senoritas
I'd have no reason to stay
Adiós and vaya con Dios
Yeah I'm leaving GA
Gonna lay in the hot sun and roll a big fat one
And grab my guitar and play
Four days flew by like a drunk Friday night
As the summer drew to an end
They can't believe that I just couldn't leave
And I bid adieu to my friends
Because my bartender she's from the islands
Her body's been kissed by the sun
And coconut replaces the smell of the bar
And I don't know if its her or the rum
I got my toes in the water, ass in the sand
Not a worry in the world, a cold beer in my hand
Life is good today Life is good today
Adiós and vaya con Dios
A long way from GA
Yes and all the muchachas they call me big poppa
When I throw pesos their way
Adiós and vaya con Dios
A long way from GA
Someone do me a favor and pour me some Jaeger
And I'll grab my guitar and play
Adiós and vaya con Dios
Going home now to stay
The senoritas don't care-o when there's no dinero
You got no money to stay
Adiós and vaya con Dios
Going home now to stay
And put my ass in a lawn chair
Toes in the clay
Not a worry in the world a PBR on the way
Life is good today
Life is good today
- Zac Brown Band/Toes

What I said to The Guy

I hadn't seen him since before the school year started. We tried to get together many times, and he canceled.

He invited us to his partner's birthday party. We were in. We were on our way to the party, we texted saying "see you in a few minutes..." and he canceled saying that the sent me a cancelation in a text the day after. He never did. I was upset and infuriated. This was back in November. We canceled weekend plans to attend this party.

We talked on the phone a couple times - always how busy he was - and how he is working hard.

We made dinner plans about a month and a half ago. We put an invite on the calendar. The day came, and that morning, after saying "see you tonight," go a text that he had to cancel because of work and his partner was busy. He canceled 4 times over the past couple of months. So I was mad. I decided to just go off on him and tell him how I felt. I told him I felt like a secondclass friend, and that's what my partner termed it. He said we never got a cancelation from the party because he probably forgot, and didn't care that much too because i'm a secondclass friend. I told him that. My partner said The Guy probably didn't know how to be a friend and have common courtesy about being friendly about canceling, and I told him that. I just went off about how I don't feel valued and how he could have common decency. All he said was "he is not going to change his plans for me, sorry."

That was the last I've heard. I know it was wrong to say all I did, but I said what I felt, and usually we can be honest and open with each other, and we always get over, or learn from what was said, so I said it. I sent him a text apologizing several times, an email, told him we can forget about what happened completely, or just move on. I even took a card and bottle of wine by his house around Feb 8 apologizing. Nothing. No thank you. Nothing. I have sent emails, called, and nothing. I am hurt because he is one of my best friends.

I have a couple of guesses - something is going on with his partner/their relationship, and he is hurting, so when I was bitching about him not telling us the party for his partner was canceled that struck a nerve. It could also be envy from the relationship I have with my partner. Or he could just be really stressed and backing out/avoiding, which drives me crazy. At least have the decency to send me a message.

Spring Break

And I have already consumed the following:

1 wine margarita
3 bottles of wine
2 margaritas
2 mimosas

Hateful coworkers

I came home nearly in tears today. I didn't tell my partner who asked me how my day was over text. I told him about the assembly we had instead. I didn't tell him about the shit I put up with at work. I was just accepted to serve on the committee for the state, and the principal sent out a congratulatory email. 4-5 people sent me a congratulations, but 6-7 people decided to give me major shit over it. I heard what a brown noser, ass kisser, and pet I was. I heard how I am just there as a stepping stone, how I don't care about the kids, how I am so far up people's ass. I didn't do anything other than apply to an email the head of curriculum for the district sent out. One idiot decided to tell me how I didn't deserve the position and have't worked as hard as he has, and don't know how my school works, people just don't do that. Manbitch gave me a hard time, suck up didn't look at me, whatever, you ass, people are a lot like you who sit on your lazy ass for 13 years. Whatever. I just had such a hard time dealing with these assholes. It took its toll on me. I stormed around all evening trying to forget.

Backstabbing

I hate to work in a place where all the other employees backstab each other. Many workplaces have these sort of people, and where I work is not immune.

We have a gossip who is constantly stirring up the pot about things she "heard." Rumors start and end through her.

We have the bombshell in the corner who takes everything that goes on in, then goes off to the teacher he shares a room with to report, and report all that takes place to admin.

There's the Antisocial Trust Fund asshole who sits in the corner and talks about his trust fund, and how he lives in such a dangerous area. Contradiction much?

There's the Manbitch, as he is called, who calls everyone out, bitches about everything.

We have "the groupies" as they are called by the gossip. You have to be invited to sit at their table at lunch, it is an honor and privilege to talk to them. You have to 3 people at this table who spread and swirl the rumors. They're the first to call out everyone's wrongs - both admin and teachers. They're the first to call in sick without sufficient time to get a sub, yet when I do it - because I have a legitimate reason it is construed that I am "taking advantage of the system." They're the first to make judgmental comments about everything taking place. They call out anyone who doesn't do their job up to par, and they're the ones who don't in the first place!

There's the in-crowd, the ones who are like wolves clamoring for power. We have 4 of those, and they are at admin's beck and call for everything. I don't want to be one of those.

I have been put on an admin track at my school, am volunteering for extra duties, etc. I am being sent to conferences and trainings because I work, because I apply what I learn into my classroom. I have been asked to lead several staff meetings in the coming month. I am friends with the gossip - she knows I'm not trying to be part of the in-crowd because I'm wise, and know that power can be lost at the turn of a hat. She knows I'm not trying that hard to be a showoff. I just like the perks that come with doing a good job. She won't talk about me behind my back or spread any rumors. Trust Fund and Manbitch will say I'm a suck up. The groupies are going to say I'm on the in-crowd, that I'm on the incrowd, and maybe I am, and maybe it'll further ostracize me to these people that I don't want to have any association with. All of this because I work hard, and I am seizing the perks of my job.

Feeling a stress

How's it going? Having a great weekend at a conference in the Bay Area for work. I don't know anyone, and that's ok. I'm just doing my things, learning, and enjoying it. I sometimes like going places I don't know anyone and getting to do my own thing, and be on my own.

Been feeling anxiety lately. Not anxiety from work, family, relationship or my personal life. I am worried about friendships as of recent - Gonzo and The Guy, but could that be it? A lot of it is we haven't talked with Gonzo, and I said some things to The Guy that really upset him, and we haven't talked in weeks. My anxiety has just spiked, and I'm not sure why. Going back on my anxiety meds... there goes being able to orgasm. Was in my hotel room last night and had the hardest time getting off.

Why not just call Eyewitness News at 11pm the Elex Michaelson Show?

Last night Elex was on 2 stories - some pursuit or maybe it was the Kyle Kraska story, and then a girl with down syndrome receiving a bunch of birthday cards. In the last 30 seconds of the story it is so awkward when he is like yelling at Ashley, and asking for a high 5. He is just so awkward. He cannot do human interest stories.


Tonight he is on a guide dog for the blind story and the Bob Simon death story. OMG. I can't watch him.

I am now watching CBS2 at 11 as of tonight. I've had enough of him.

Line dancing, yee haw!!!

So I'm making it a goal to become better at line dancing this year. I am making it my goal to go to the local line dancing club on nights they have line dancing, and my partner is not home. He won't go to the club for many reasons - the people aren't that accepting he thinks, he doesn't dance, and its something I can do with my cousins instead of him. So the times I get to go are very slim...

I blogged already there's a gay line dance bar in the Silverlake portion of LA, but that's far. I've been. Years ago.

I try to watch youtube videos and memorize the steps, but there are so many dances. There are the basics - the 2 step, the tush push, electric slide, cha cha slide, and cupid shuffle. I can mostly do those. I can't remember all the steps.

I also find when I watch the youtube videos as the people are doing all sorts of turns and end up facing the wall (and me away from the screen), I can't see the steps, and I've already forgotten it.

I find I have to be in the club watching other people and mimic their steps for me to learn. Somehow my brain and watching the steps, and mimicking what I see on youtube does not match.

I want to get better, but when I don't have friends around, and can't make sense of the youtube videos it seems like a losing game.

So for now, I am going to use these cheat sheets. 

Exercise suggestions

I hate to say it - I can no longer eat or drink anything without doing a lot of exercise to burn off the calories. A couple of glasses of wine or alcohol here or there, some sweets, and savory foods thrown in all catch up with me.

I've been stuck around 170lbs for weeks.

So at the gym I've been switching up what I do - I go 4 days, and do cardio 2, then weights 2 (legs and upper body).

My partner after 5 years of saying he would never go to the gym has just given in. He is telling me my issue is I do weights. He said I should just be going and doing straight cardio each day. He said it is not about having muscle definition - it is about being skinny. He brings up the example of our friend B, who is into swimming. He swims 4-5 times a week for 30 minutes a day. He has the same exact build as me. SAME. If you were to place us side by side in our bathing suits you would see the tone in the same places. He is, however, able to burn and keep the weight off. Is it because he is doing cardio? I am debating. He has lost 2 pant sizes. I am thinking of switching to 3 days cardio and 1 day weights.

Any suggestions to help me bring sexy back?

It's Britney, Bitch

That's right, It's Britney. Saw her in Vegas with my partner last night. Total last minute tickets. We were in row P, paid about $100. Definitely a lot of lip syncing going on, not a lot of artist/audience interaction, so it seemed very staged and she seemed distant from the audience. Those in the pit didn't really seem to be doing anything crazy other than standing there.

After 3 Southern Comfort and Sprites, 1/2 bottle of pinot grigio, a glass at the theater, and Voco (vodka and coconut water), I became quite the philosopher (I was not drunk - I hold my alcohol well,) but at that point I'm loose enough to let my realizations flow...

Britney's songs are like my life story. I relate to Britney so well. We all have those naive moments (I'm Not A Girl... Not Yet A Woman), Sometimes we love, sometimes we hide (Sometimes), when we try to leave our parents and become (Overprotected), and I'm not perfect and sometimes repeat things I shouldn't do (Oops I did it Again!). Then when I hit 21 I was suddenly Toxic. And that's about the time I came out, and in the gay world, You Better Work Bitch, and maybe I had some of those in the bedroom "I'm A Slave For You" moments. And we all have those moments where "I Wanna Go" all the way tonight, and I'll keep dancing or working "Until the World Ends." And life's experiences make me "Stronger" than yesterday.

Pics to come.

We made it

Long and tough month.

It was my birthday month. 2-3 days after my birthday, the inlaws showed up for the month. It wasn't too bad. They have been here 2 times before with me around. They are nice enough. His mom and I get along well, but his dad is very opinionated and harder to deal with. I enjoyed being taken out to dinner many nights and being wined and dined. I won't miss FOX News each night, the car auction shows on TV, and all other sporting events on TV.

Spent lots of time on the phone with my parents- I call them daily - listening to their kitchen remodel nightmare. My advice to you - avoid really commercial sounding names when it comes to home improvement projects, and don't choose a contractor just because he "is a good Christian" and has the Christian fish symbol on his business card. I find so often those "good" Christians are out to take people who give into that shit - my parents included. Thank god I don't live at home.

I am teaching an extra class at work - that has taken a lot of my time too.

I've been applying for adjunct positions at the local colleges. No bites so far. Damn.

I think I'm going to do that admin degree. I need something to occupy my time. Don't wanna take out the loan.

Top 13 LA Anchors

Thrillist released a list of what it thought were the top 13 newscasters in Los Angeles.
Not everyone agreed with the list. KTLAentertainment reporter Sam Rubin wrote on his facebook page, “In what is clearly an error of judgement of the highest order not a single KTLA on-air staffer is included in what can only be described as a bogus baker’s dozen.”
Here’s the list from 13 to number one: 13) Steve Edwards 12) Fred Roggin 11) Pat Harvey 10) John Ireland 9) Dave Bryan 8) Bri Winkler7) Marc Brown 6) Fritz Coleman 5) Jim Hill 4) Colleen Williams 3) Chuck Henry 2) Christine Devine and #1) Dallas Raines.

I disagree completely with this list - here are my 13, and my list in my opinion has much more merit. 

13. Dave Lopez (KCBS/KCAL) - He doesn't anchor, but he's a reporter. He is one of the best around. He always tells the story differently than any competitor, finds the human interest in it, and gives sides a lot of reporters don't.

12. Pablo Pereira (KTTV 11) - Famous background - grandpa has Oscar awards. He focuses on atmospheric science stories, drives an electric RAV4, is sexy, and knows his stuff. He's been on KABC, KNBC, and KTTV. He knows LA. 

11. Garth Kemp (KABC 7) - Keeps me entertained, knows his weather, and likes animals. Oh, and my mom likes him, which says a lot.

10. Henry Dicarlo (KTLA 5) - He knows when to be funny, when to be serious. He is a sharp dresser and damn sexy. He is also a meteorologist and sports guy. 

9. Rick Dickert (KTTV 11) - He may be young looking, but he's damn sexy, he is versatile and does traffic/weather. He was the first Certified Broadcast Meteorologist in LA. He is sometimes heard on NPR.

8. Alysha DelValle (KABC 7) - She's all LA. She is a sexy latina. She knows alternative routes. She shouts out to her WAZE users every morning. 

7. Robert Holguin (KABC7) - Anchor and reporter. Great and knowledgeable storyteller. 

6. Dallas Raines (KABC 7) - His moves, his suits, his weather knowledge.

5. Marc Brown - (KABC 7) - Anchor and reporter. Covered most major events in the city since the 90s. 

4. Michelle Tuzee (KABC 7) - Professional, always dressed professionally.

3. Rick Chambers (KTLA 5) - I remember him covering the LA Riots, I remember his suspenders he used to wear. He is professional

2. Colleen Williams (KNBC 4) - A fixture on LA news since the 80s, credible and reliable.

1. Pat Harvey (KCBS 2) - Versatile, classy, great anchor, always professional dress, and great storyteller

In regards to what Sam Rubin said about no KTLA people on the Thrillist list,  I am not surprised. Few people probably know about Frank Buckley's CNN days. I can't call Courtney Friel, Chris Schauble, Megan Henderson or Jessica Holmes authoritative or good anchors. Micah Ohlman, I mean he's Paul Moyer's nephew. Paul Moyer would have made the list, but Micah acts like he is trying too hard. 

How the hell is Christine Devine #2? I have chronicled my dislike for her over the years. 

And Bri Winkler? She's small market. She came from like Amarillo, Texas. I can assure you it is not for her forecasting abilities. 

Fritz Coleman is hard to watch, though he is a fixture in LA, and a comedian. 

I do like Fred Roggin and John Ireland - both are versatile and have radio shows, and extensive sports knowledge. 

My sister annoys the crap out of me

Went to dinner tonight with the parents and sister- didn't let my sister overshadow conversation. I was telling them about a few things at work, and then my sister, Ms. Wannabe A Professor interrupted constantly (she teaches 2 classes at the community college - I think she got hired because she has a super specialized degree, and was one of the few people that can teach it.) Her reviews are horrific. I sincerely hope she will not be hired on full-time. 

Anyways, so I am telling about work, and a student with an ankle monitor, a brick cell phone that his probation officer can call at anytime, and my sister chimes in. My sister must be Mother Teresa when it comes to comforting people. She said she has had a dozen convicted felons in her class. She said she doesn't flinch when they come to class. She makes them volunteers in her classes, she asks them to help her reach things like the overhead projector screen. She doesn't flinch or treat them differently. She loves her felons because they are good deep down, everyone has their own story to share. She said they work the hardest in her class. She said they work harder than the normal student. She said they have tattoos, they are scary looking, but she treats them nicely. Um... dumb dumb, isn't that what a teacher is supposed to do? Why is your situation so much more heroic than mine? I deal with the kids before they get to the point she is at. I asked her those questions and she told me she has had more training to handle them than I have. WTF? What training did you have? Felon 101? I don't get it. I have the little education bits from my education classes while getting my credential -inside the class is a neutral zone, so gang members and kids who are on probation etc. don't tend to act up so much int he class. I have dealt with kids who have ankle monitors, I ran a militaristic style classroom when I taught middle school. I had classroom management, bitch, so I didn't have crazy issues with the kids with records. My sister gets to me. I can't think of any training she would have that would give her more experience than me. I pointed that out. She tried to tell me she read a textbook that had stories about police treatment and a friend wrote a thesis on police interrogations. 

My sister then had to tell me how her students love her so much. They want to walk with her to class. They pull down the overhead screen for her. She writes their names into test questions. She lets them eat in class. Her class is so lively. She is able to get the quietest kids to talk. She is able to engage even the most difficult student. When leaving class she always has a dozen students with her, and they often walk her to her car. Really? I have the hardest time believing that. Her reviews on ratemyprofessor say otherwise. They talk about how boring she is and how difficult the class is. They talk about who she doesn't know what she is talking about. Now I'm an ok teacher - I may be good - but I can promise you, rarely do I have 100% of students engaged, on task, or participating. When I taught middle and did a review game I would have 95-100% on task. When I gave a test I would have 95-100% on task. In the last 2-3 minutes of class when it came to cleanup I would often have less than 20% on task. When I lectured or gave notes it would be 60-80% on task and engaged. When technology was involved in the assignment my personal best was 98% on task - and I'm just going through numbers that had been recorded. But this is part of why I was under so much stress at the middle school. People running around telling me what I wasn't doing when 1 or 2 kids weren't engaged... when I had 60-80% On task. I know this because my school was big on data and we had coaches in our classrooms all the time telling us this information. Even now, in the setting I work at, at an alternative school, I would estimate I have 80-100% on task or engaged at any one time. It is the nature of teaching. I have more experience. I think I have more training. I have taken classes on engagement and teaching students. My brainiac sister has not taken any sort of classes. When your reviews are so bad - not just at one - but 2 campuses - obviously there is an issue. What you're telling me cannot be true. You are trying to overcompensate to make yourself sound better. Even the best teachers I know cannot claim what you claim. I was never one to speak up in class - especially in college - you could call on me and I would say it was the person behind you were calling, even if it were the wall. I just flat out wouldn't talk. 

Music Weekend

I cannot get enough of this new one...
Heartbeat Song


Nick Jonas - Jealous
Jealous of his body.


Ed Sheeran - Don't
His stuff just sounds different than all else out there.


And an oldie

Love me some Supremes.

And one more.

Almost there...

Need a weekend badly. Badly.

Work is kicking my arse. Teaching an extra class - that's not the problem. AC is out in my room again. Moving rooms period to period and lugging my crap takes a toll emotionally and physically. lol. 4 days and I'm tired of it. I was telling one teacher I chose not to teach Monday and gave the kids bookwork, and that translated into 4 days of it because it is easy when I'm moving from room to room each period.

Getting back into the gym swing. Went Monday, Tuesday, Thursday morning and afternoon. Proud of myself.

I walked an average of 15,000 steps a day in NYC - my steps now are like 6-7,000.

Need a massage badly. Have an appointment next week with My Chola as I call her. Hands hurt; lower right back has a knot, as always; have a knot in the back of my left leg; and of course my feet.

We got another cat. Like him already.

Parents going through a nightmare kitchen redo.

My mom has to have her hip re-replaced due to doctor error.